Alice in Wonderland

Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister at the bank, and having nothing to do. She was even considering in her own mind (as well as she could) for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid that perhaps she should go over her lessons as she’d been told to do in the school on that morning.

Reading, writing and arythmetic

Are such an awful bore.

Reading, writing and arythmetic

Are not what little girls are for.

Add it up, subtract,

Add it up, subtract,

Now multiply by nine.

I don’t want to work any more, any more.

I want to go and play with Dinah [ ].

Dinah is my cat.

She’s a funny little cat.

The sweetest, furriest, purriest cat.

She’s got silky ears,

And big green eyes,

And splendid whiskers of enormous size.

Add it up, subtract,

Add it up, subtract,

Now multiply by nine.

She follows me around, the silky shadow of fur.

There’s never been a lady in waiting like her.

But when I have my dreary lessons to do,

Dinah goes off to chase a leaf or two.

Add it up, subtract,

Add it up, subtract,

Now multiply by nine.

Cats like humans are curious mixtures.

They don’t like books without any pictures.

Alice was finding it more and more difficult to keep her eyes open when suddenly something so extraordinary occurred that she started to her feet in amazement. It was not so very remarkable to see a white rabbit with pink eyes and very smartly dressed in a gay checked waistcoat hurry past her. But as Alice watched he paused uncertainly and took a watch from his waistcoat pocket. This did surprise her. “How curious. I don’t remember ever seeing a rabbit in a waistcoat before, and certainly I’ve never seen one with a watch and chain. He seems very put out. Perhaps I ought to ask if I can be of any help. But do Rabbits speak English?

Oh, my ears and whiskers!

Oh dear, oh dear! I shall be too late. Whatever shall I do?

Decisions, decisions!

I’ve got to make decisions.

I don’t know what to do with the day.

Shall I fill it with memories

Or shall I throw it away?

Decisions, decisions!

I’ve got to make decisions.

There isn’t really time to delay.

Shall I sit under the apple trees or go and play in the hay?

There’s a meeting of the rabbit’s guide

In farmer Turner’s turnip field.

I really think I ought to attend.

And yet upon the other hand

My services are in demand.

I’ve got a broken hedge I ought to mend

Decisions, decisions!

I’ve got to make decisions!

I’ve really got to get on my way.

A rabbit’s life is a busy life.

I’ve got to make decisions!

It’s no use having visions.

I’ve got to make decisions today.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! My ears and whiskers!

Whatever shall I do?

With a nervous sniff the White Rabbit clapped his watch into his pocket and scurried across the field and disappeared down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge. Burning with curiosity Alice raced after him. And not stopping to think for a moment she dived into the rabbit-hole. It seemed very dark and airy inside after the sunlit field. And Alice in her anxiety to catch up with the White Rabbit quite forgot to look where she was going and found herself falling down a very deep well.

Down, down, down she went: “Ah, ah, well, after such a fall as this I shall think nothing of falling downstairs.

I wonder how many miles I’ve fallen. Oh dear, my poor little cat Dinah will miss me tonight. I hope they’ll remember her saucer of milk at tea-time. It’s a very long way down. Perhaps I’m falling through … the earth.

“Ah, ah, that was lucky. These lovely soft leaves have broken my fall nicely. “Oh, there goes the White Rabbit!” “Oh, oh, my tail and whiskers. Oh, how late it’s getting! Oh, how late it’s getting! Late it’s getting”.

Alice raced round the corner after the White Rabbit and found herself in a long, low hall which was lit up by lamps hanging from the roof. There were doors all round the hall. She tried each one eagerly. “… all the doors are locked. How am I ever to get out of here?

Oh … how very curious! A little glass table! With something on it. A little golden key, a bottle labelled “Drink me”, and a little cake labelled “Eat me”.

“Curiouser, curiouser”

Alice found that the little golden key fitted the smallest door exactly. It opened on to the loveliest garden she ever saw. But alas! She was much too big to squeeze through such a little door. However, being an obedient little girl she drank from the bottle labelled “Drink me”. And to her astonishment she began to shrink rapidly.

Soon she was small enough to get through the little door. But now she was too small to reach the key which unfortunately she’d left on the table. There was only one thing to do. She quickly nibbled the cake labelled “Eat me”. And oh, dear, she grew and grew like the largest telescope that ever was! Poor Alice! All this shrinking and growing was enough to upset anybody. She tried hard not to cry and scolded herself severely: ”Come you really must stop crying like this. Quick, I like you. This won’t get you into that lovely garden you know.

“Stop this minute, I tell you!” but she went on crying and shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool all around her. And soon the water was up to her chin.

Oh, help! Oh, oh I do wish I hadn’t cried so much! That will be a queer thing if I’m drowned in my own tears. But, everything is queer today! I know I must breathe regularly, and swim out to the nearest bank”.

Swimming was not so easy because the pool was getting quite crowded with the birds and animals that had fallen into it. There was the Duck, and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet. And Several other curious creatures. Alice led the way and the whole party swam to the ashore.

She was glad of their company and to make polite conversation started talking about Dinah. “You’d love Dinah-cat. She’s a capital one for catching mice! Oh and I wish you could see her after the birds! Why, she’ll eat a little bird as soon as she looked at it”.

This speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party, who all made various excuses and disappeared in a great hurry. “I wish I hadn’t mentioned Dinah! Nobody seems to like her down here. Oh, I do hope somebody is coming back”.

“Oh, why it’s the White Rabbit again. Oh, please, sir!”

“Oh, oh, oh, the Duchess! The Duchess! Oh, well. She’d be sad if I kept her waiting. Oh, my dear paws! Oh, my fur and whiskers! She’ll get me executed. Oh, dear, oh, dear”. Off he went like a streak of lightning. Alice traced him until she was out of breath. As she leaned against a buttercup to rest, fanning herself with a leaf, her eyes suddenly met those of a large blue caterpillar sitting on a mushroom. He was quietly smoking a long hookah which is a Turkish bubble pipe, and taking not the smallest notice of her or of anything else.

They looked at each other for some time in silence. Then he addressed her it a languid, sleepy voice:

- Who are you?

- I-I hardly know, sir, just at present. I know who I was this morning, but I’ve changed several times since then.

- Explain yourself.

- It is difficult to put it more clearly. I can’t understand it myself. Being so many sizes in a day is very confusing.

- It isn’t.

- Perhaps you haven’t found it so. All I know is it feels very queer to me.

- You! Who are you?

- I think you ought to tell me who are you, first.

- Why?

- Well, if that’s what you’ve got to say.

- Keep your temper. So you think you’ve changed, do you?

- Well, I can’t remember things as I used to. I tried to say “How does the busy little bee”, but it came all different.

- Repeat “You are old, Father William”

- “You are old, Father William”

- That is not said right. It is wrong from beginning to end.

(from Recordings for Children)

Date: 2015-12-17; view: 1176