ARTICLE 107

A Bro never leaves another Bro hanging.

Besides the obvious health hazards inherent in keeping an arm aloft for an extended period of time, the emotional effects of leaving a Bro out to dry in public can be devastating. If you ever see a Bro, even one you don't know, looking around frantically with a paw held high in the air, throw him a Brone and hit him up top.

COMMON BRO FIVES

CLASSIC FIVE

THE FIST BUMP

THE EXPLODING FIST BUMP

AROUND THE WORLD

THE SELF FIVE

THE RELAPSE FIVE

BRO CODE FIVE!

(tear this one out and carry it with you so you'll never be left hanging…)

ARTICLE 108

If Bro forgets a guy's name, he may call him "brah," "dude," or "man," but never "Bro."

ARTICLE 109

When Bros attend a sporting event and see themselves on the JumboTron, they shall purse their lips and flex their biceps while informing the crowd that their team is number one, despite any objective rankings to the contrary.

ARTICLE 110

If a Bro is hitting it off with a chick, his Bro shall do anything within his means to ensure the desired outcome.

You and your Bros will undoubtedly face many seemingly insurmountable challenges on your quest to score a one-night stand. Here are some techniques to make them mountable.

TROUBLESHOOTING THE ONE-NIGHT STAND

PROBLEM / FIX

I forgot her name / Have a Bro introduce himself and listen closely. Note: Choose your ugliest Bro.

She rejected my drink offer / Offer her breakfast in bed as an alternative. If she doesn't acquiesce, say you were kidding.

She's having a girls' night out / Identify and target the reason for the girls' night out — the recently dumped chick

The lights came on — she's ugly / Squint hard. If she asks what you're doing, say you forgot your glasses or you're just deeply concerned about the environment or something

Date: 2014-12-21; view: 1133