Consider Both Sides of Your Topic and Take a Position

This essay is too short (233 words instead of mandatory 250), which may get it penalized. On the bright side, it covers the task and has a sound structure on the essay level. The paragraphs are coherent and are logically connected by linking words; the sentences are well-structured and the vocabulary is adequate. There were some inaccuracies, see comments underlined in blue. Overall, this looks like a band 6 essay.

Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

In the present age, globalization is playing an increasingly important role in our lives. But in the meantime whether it is a blessing or a curse has sparked a heated debate. Some people argue that globalization has a fundamentally beneficial influence on our lives, while many others contend that it has a detrimental effect as well.

A convincing argument can be made about globalization not only playing a pivotal role in the development of technology and economy, but also promoting the cultural exchange between different countries. To start with, it is the globalization that impelled many corporate to become international groups, thereby making a contribution to the local technology and employment. Specifically, when a multinational group establish a factory in a developing country, the new equipment, the new management skills and the job vacancies are all in the best interest of the local society. Moreover, people worldwide can get to know each other better through globalization. It is easy to see that more and more Hollywood blockbusters show cultures different from American, some recent examples are ‘Kungfu Panda’ and ‘The Mummy’.

Admittedly, the profit driven side of globalization has severely affected young people. Today, in the metropolises in different countries, it is very common to see teenagers wearing NIKE T-shirts and Adidas footwear, playing Hip-Hop music on Apple iPods and eating at KFC. The culture that took a thousand years to form just seems similar in these cities; it seems as though you can only distinguish them by their language. Meanwhile, in some developing countries, sweat workshops are always a concerning issue. For instance, reports show that some teenagers employed by NIKE’s contractors work in smelly factories over 14 hours a day, but are only paid fifty cents per hour.

To sum up, I would concede that globalization does come with some adverse effects. Despite that fact, benefits created by it far outweigh the disadvantages. Overall, I am convinced that we should further promote globalization and meanwhile the local government should take measures to combat culture assimilation and sweat workshops.

This essay is extremely long (338 words instead of the advised 250-265). It has a sound structure, your position is clearly expressed, the information is well-organized, and structure-wise the sentences are fine. The vocabulary is impressive and there were only a few grammatical errors (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, this seems to be a band 7.5 + essay.

Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Globalization is such a commonly used term in the twentieth century. It simply means that the world has become integrated economically, socially, politically and culturally through the advances of technology, transportation and communication. It is undeniable that globalization has resulted in both positive and negative effects which must be addressed accordingly.

To begin with, globalization has contributed to the world’s economies in many beneficial ways. The advances in science and technology have allowed businesses to easily cross over territorial boundary lines. Consequently, companies tend to become more productive and competitive thereby raising the quality of goods, services and the world’s living standard.

Secondly, several companies from the more developed countries have already ventured to establish foreign operations or branches to take advantage of the low cost of labor in the poorer countries. This kind of business activity will provide more influx of cash or investment funds into the less developed countries.

However, one cannot deny the negative effects which have derived from globalization. One crucial social aspect is the risk and danger of epidemic diseases which can easily be spread as the transportation becomes easier and faster in today’s advanced society. This is evidenced in the recent birds flu disease which has infected most Asian countries over a short period of time.

As large corporations invest or take over many offshore businesses, a modern form of colonization will also evolve which may pose certain power pressure on the local governments of the less developed countries. Unemployment rates in the more developed regions such as Europe may also escalate as corporations choose to outsource to the cheaper work force from Asian countries.

In conclusion. I like to reiterate that globalization is inevitable and we must urge individuals, companies and governments to use a more balanced approach by taking the appropriate steps to deal with matters relating to the financial or economical gains verses the social, political or ecological concerns of the world.

This essay is too long, 318 words instead of 250-265. Otherwise (except for some minor grammatical errors) it is a very nice work. It covers the task, has the right structure, the paragraphs are coherent and are logically connected by elegantly used linking words, the structure of sentences is fine and so is your vocabulary. Seems worthy of Band 7.5 or 8.

Even though globalization affects the world’s economy in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Globalization is a process of advancement and increase in interaction between the worlds’ countries and people. It involes in locomotion, communication, knowledge and skills. Globalazation is gaining speen over the entire world. It has attract enough world attention needed from international organization in promoting and encouraging human right and freedom , opportunities, economic, social and culture rights.

However, there are some countries that are missing out the opportunities that are offered and its taken as a big problem to their country. They are the poorer countries that are not connected to the people globally and their people are unskilled due to the lack of knowledge and equipments. They are also unable to trade with the other countries which are richer and larger as they are unable to meet the demand propose of them. They also will not have the opportunities and the challenges that are require.

Globalization has also encourage crimes like the illegal drug trafficking around the world through the air, sea and land. This has involved human smuggling and stuffing it in anything they come across. This has affected a lot of problems to the country and the families of the drug addicts. This will also lead to other crimes like robbery and violence in the country.

Another negative side of globalization is the dumping of the dangerous waste to the river, sea or the ocean. This will effect the aquactic creature, contaninate the water and cause harm to the people too.

To conclude, globalization has contributed a lot to the world’s econnmics but the international organization should also not forget the poorer countries and the countries should also tackle its other negative sides that affect the world.

This essay doesn’t have a paragraph about the positive side of globalization, and it should – so the task is only partially covered. The structure is fine, the paragraphs are logically connected and linking words are used effectively enough. However, there are many spelling and grammatical errors (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, this looks like a Band 6 – 6.5 essay.

Even though Globalization affects the world’s economics in a very positive way, its negative sides should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Everything has tow sides in the world, and so has the prosses of globalization too. The effects of globalization on the world economy are diverted.

We must acknowledge that the negative effects are from a different kind than the positive ones.Therfor the negative sides, like low paiment in less developed countries are important to conciderate.

If we take the Eurozone for example, the economic changes according to the gloablisation process are huge. Many companies have transferred their factories into cheaper production earies to compeat in the world markes. The results are rising unemployment rates in the “old industrial countries”.

In regard to the other countries on the world market, such as China, this job transfer is a big opportunity. But no one can denie that the consequences for the less developed countries where economy flourished, based on availability of cheap employees are highly important: globalization based on this facts brings enviromantal problems.

Nevertheless, there are also posive reasons for globlaistaional effects. In general it is remarkable that there is a new tendency in “Thinking Global”. For instance, people are willing to leran more languages and get educated about othe cultures. Countries fromaly knowen as undeveloped, such as India, are getting chances to be the main leader in a certain field.

All in all it can be said that the effects of globalization are enormous. The unerstanding of economic processes has changed completely. It is important to think in bigger terms, not just about the owen country. The positive things that this globalization process have brought must sensible us for the negative sides. The all over aim should be a world in balance, but this has yet to come.

This essay needs work. There are multiple spelling errors and unclear expressions (see comments underlined in blue). Also there are many words that are formed incorrectly (diverted instead of diverse, etc). There are too many paragraphs, all you need is 4 – 5 well-structured paragraphs, not 7 poorly structured ones. On the bright side, the task is covered and there are enough words (275), which is good. The paragraphs are logically connected and the linking words are used effectively. Overall, this looks like a Band 6 essay.

Consider Both Sides of Your Topic and Take a Position

Once you have selected a topic you feel strongly about, you should make a list of points for both sides of the argument and pick a side.

One of your first objectives in your essay will be to present both sides of your issue with an assessment of each. Of course, you will conclude that one side (your side) is the best conclusion.

In the planning stage you will need to consider strong arguments for the "other" side. Then you'll shoot them down!

Gather Evidence

When we think of arguments we might picture two red-faced people speaking quite loudly and making dramatic gestures. But that's because face-to-face arguments often become emotional. In fact, the act of arguing involves providing proof to support your claim, with or without emotions.

In an argument essay you will have to provide evidence without providing too much drama. You'll explore two sides of a topic (briefly) and provide proof as to why one side or position is the best one.

Writing Stage

Once you've given yourself a solid foundation to work with, you can begin to craft your essay. An argument essay should contain three parts: the introduction, the body, and the conclusion. The length of these parts (number of paragraphs) will vary, depending on the length of your essay assignment

Date: 2015-12-17; view: 856