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Departure and Return Home

 

Departure

 

Have a wonderful trip!

Have a wonderful trip!

Don't forget to call me

when you get back.

 

Have a wonderful trip!

Have a wonderful trip!

Don't forget to call me

when you get back.

 

Have a wonderful trip!

Don’t worry, I will.

Have a wonderful trip!

Don’t worry, I will.

Don't forget to call me.

Don’t worry, I won't.

Don't forget to call me.

Don’t worry, I won't.

Return

Gee, it's good to see you

You look wonderful!

So do you!

It's been a long time!

It sure has.

It's been a long time!

It sure has.

I missed you terribly.

Me too!

I'm so glad you're back!

So am I.

 

On a Diet

 

First she gave up smoking.

Then she gave up gin.

Then she gave up chocolate cake.

She wanted to be thin.

 

Then she gave up breakfast.

Then she gave up lunch.

On lazy Sunday mornings

she even gave up brunch.

 

No matter what she gave up,

her skirts were very tight.

'Cause she ate twelve cans of tuna fish

for dinner every night.

 

Twelve Cans of Tuna Fish Rag

Twelve cans! Twelve cans!

Twelve cans of tuna fish. Twelve cans.

How many cans?

Twelve, twelve.

Did you say twelve?

Yes, I said twelve.

Twelve cans of what?

Twelve cans of fish.

Twelve cans of fish?

Yes, fish, yes, fish.

What kind of fish?

Tuna, tuna.

Twelve cans of tuna fish?

Yes, twelve cans.

Oh, my goodness!

No wonder she’s fat!

How often does she eat

those twelve cans of tuna?

How often does she eat

those twelve big cans?

 

Every night, every night.

She eats twelve cans of tuna fish

every night.

You're kidding!

Oh, my goodness!

No wonder she's fat!

That's a lot of tuna.

It sure is!

That's a lot of tuna.

It sure is!

That's too much tuna, if you ask me.

It sure is! It sure is!

Twelve cans of tuna is a lot of fish

if you ask me, if you ask me.

It sure is!

It sure is!

 

Panic on Being Late

What time is it?

What time is it?

Hurry up! Hurry up!

Hurry up! Hurry up!

What time is it?

What time is it?

Please hurry up!

We're going to be late!

Oh, I don’t have time

to talk to you now.

I'm late, I'm late, I'm terribly late.

Hurry up! Hurry up!

What time is it?

Hurry up! Hurry up!

What time is it?

Hurry up!

What time is it?

Hurry up!

 

21. Ouch! That Hurts

Ouch!

What's the matter?

I stubbed my toe.

Oh, that hurts, that hurts.

I know that hurts.

Ouch!

What's the matter?

I bit my tongue.

Oh, that hurts, that hurts.

I know that hurts.

Ouch!

What's the matter?

 

I got a cramp in my foot.

Oh, that hurts, that hurts.

I know that hurts.

Ouch! Ouch!

What's the matter now?

I bumped into the table,

tripped on the stairs,

slipped on the carpet,

fell over the chairs.

Gee! You're clumsy today!

 

22. Would You Walk to China If You Had the Time?



Would you walk to China if you had the time?

Would you leave at a quarter to three?

Would you walk to China if you had the time?

Would you walk to China with me?

 

Of course, I'd walk to China if I had the time.

I'd leave at a quarter to three.

Of course, I'd walk to China tomorrow night,

if I were only free.

 

Why can't you walk to China tomorrow night?

Why can't you go to China at three?

Why can't you walk out on your sweet sugar cat

and sail to China with me?

 

Well, I have to stay home and take care of my plants

take care of my darling too,

and I’d never walk out on my sweet sugar cat

and go to China with you.

 

Major Decisions

How do you like your coffee?

Black! Black!

How do you like your tea?

With lemon, please.

How do you like your steak?

Medium rare.

How do you like your eggs?

I don't care!

Sunny-side up?

I don't care!

Poached on toast?

I don't care!

Scrambled, with bacon?

I don't care!

Over-easy?

I don't care!

Soft-boiled? Hard-boiled?

I don't care!

How about an omelet?

I don't care!

Come on, tell me!

This isn’t fair.

I told you the truth.

I really don't care!

 

I Gave It Away

I gave it away.

You what?

I gave it away.

What did you say?

I said I gave it away.

Gave it away?

That's what I said.

I said I gave it away.

Why?

Because I wanted to.

You wanted to?

Yes, I wanted to.

Why didn’t you sell it?

Sell it?

Yes, sell it, sell it.

Why didn't you sell it?

I didn’t want to.

Why not? Why not?

I didn’t want to.

Why not? Why not?

I didn't want to.

Why didn’t you give it to me?

I didn't want to.

Why didn't you give it to him?

I didn’t want to.

Why didn’t you give it to her?

I didn’t want to.

Why didn't you give it to them?

I didn’t want to.

I didn’t want to.

25. Banker's Wife's Blues

Where does John live?

He lives near the bank.

Where does he work?

He works at the bank.

When does he work?

 

He works all day and he works all night,

at the bank, at the bank, at the great, big bank.

Where does he study?

He studies at the bank.

Where does he sleep?

He sleeps at the bank.

Why does he spend all day, all night,

all day, all night, at the bank, at the bank?

Because he loves his bank more than his wife

and he loves his money more than his life.

Tell Me Your Name

Tell me your name again, please.

Tell me your name.

 

Tell me your first name.

Tell me your last name.

 

Spell your name for me, please.

Spell your name.

 

Pronounce your name for me, please.

Say it again.

 

What a beautiful name!

What a lovely name!

 

Sand

If I were home,

If I were home,

I'd run to the beach,

take off my shoes

and walk in the sand.

 

I'd shake the sand out of my shoes.

I'd feel it between my toes.

I'd smell wet sand in my hair.

I'd feel it in my eyes.

 

My face would sparkle from the sand.

I would say, "I hate this sand."

Back home, the bed would be full of sand

and my clothes, and my hair.

I would wake up and feel the sand in my hair.

Oh, it's been so long

since I have felt sand

in my hair.

Late Again

Are you ready?

Are you ready?

Are you ready to go?

Not quite, not quite.

Just a minute, don't rush me!

Hurry up, hurry up!

Hurry up, hurry up!

I'll be ready in a minute,

in a minute, in a minute.

I can't find my keys!

I can't find my keys!

Come on, let's go!

Come on, let's go!

I can't find my socks!

I can't find my socks!

Come on, let's go!

Let's go, let's go!

I can't find my shoes!

I can't find my shoes!

Come on, let's go!

Let's go, let's go!

Your keys are in your hand,

Your socks are in your shoes,

Your shoes are on the floor.

Let's go, let's go!

Warning

Watch out! Watch out!
Watch out! Watch out!
Watch out!
There's a hole in the floor!

What?

A hole.

Where?

In the floor.

A hole in the floor?

Yes, a hole in the floor,

A great big hole in the floor.

Well, I don't see any hole in the floor.

I don't see any hole.

It's there!

Where?

Right there!

Right here?

Yes, right there.

Are you sure?

Sure, I'm sure. It's big as a house.

Big?

It's huge.

Huge?

It's huge.

A huge hole, a great big hole,

a great big hole in the floor.

I think you`re kidding.

You're teasing me.

There's no hole in the . . .

Friends

Well, I've known Jack for fourteen years.
He's a pretty good friend of mine.

She's known Jack for fourteen years.
He's a pretty good friend of hers.

And I've known Bill for thirteen years.

He's a pretty good friend of mine.

She's known Bill for thirteen years.

He's a pretty good friend of hers.

I've known them both for quite a long time.

They're pretty good friends of mine.

She's known them both for quite a long time.

They're pretty good friends of hers.

I've known Jim for a long time.

He's an old, old friend of mine.

She's known Jim for a long time

He's an old, old friend of hers.

We're old friends, old friends.

He's a dear, old friend of mine.

How long have you known your old friend Sue?

How long have you known dear Claude and Sue?

Well, I met them just before I met you.

They're my closest friends, dear Claude and Sue.

Easy Solutions

Gee, I'm hungry;

Have a sandwich.

Gee, I'm angry!

Calm down!

Gee, I'm sleepy!

Take a nap!

Gee, it's chilly in here!

Put on a sweater.

Gee, it's hot in here!

Open a window.

I've got the hiccups!

Drink some water.

My nose itches.

Scratch it.

My feet hurt.

Sit down for awhile.

My shoes are tight.

Take them off.

I have a toothache.

Go to the dentist.

I have a headache.

Take some aspirin.

I'm lonely!

Call up a friend.

I'm bored!

Go to a movie.

Love Song

Does she love him?

Yes, she does.

Is she happy?

Yes, she is.

Does he know it?

Yes, he does, yes, he knows it.

Will she hug him?

Yes, she will.

Will she kiss him?

Yes, she will.

Will she leave him?

Yes, she will, if she has to.

Does he love her?

Yes, he does.

Is he happy?

Yes, he is.

Does she know it?

Yes, she does, yes, she knows it.

Will he hug her?

Yes, he will.

Will he kiss her?

Yes, he will.

Will he leave her?

Yes, he will, if he has to.

Are they happy?

Yes, they are.

Are they lucky?

Yes, they are.

Do they know it?

Yes, they do, yes they know it.

Will he find somebody new?

Will she find somebody too?

Yes, they will.

Yes, they will, if they have to.

On the Rocks

You never listen to me.

What did you say?

You never listen to me.

What?

He never listens, to me.

He never talks to me.

He just sits, around, and watches TV.

 

She never listens to me.

She never talks to me.

She just sits around,

and watches TV.

She never listens to me.

She just sits around.

She never talks to me.

She just sits around.

She just sits around.

She just sits around,

and watches TV.

She just sits around.

He never listens to me.

He just sits around.

He never talks to me.

He just sits around.

He just sits around.

He just sits around,

and watches TV.

He just sits around.


Date: 2015-12-11; view: 826


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