VIOLATIONS

Violations of the Bro Code may result in a fine of up to $250,000 or in some cases, permanent dis-Broment. Unresolved disputes over the Bro Code may be submitted via email to the International Court of Bros at barneystinson@barneysblog.com, provided such disputes include pictures of the chicks involved. But only if they're hot — the chicks, not the disputes.

There is no greater affront to the spirit of the Bro Code than a willing violation. While occasionally a Bro may err due to inebriation, a momentary lapse of judgment, or if a chick is so hot that other Bros would say "he didn't really have a choice," any premeditated infraction of the Bro Code is inexcusable. When a Bro violates the Bro Code, he hurts not only his Bros but also himself, because he is no longer Bro worthy.

It's important to note that there are no tenets of the Bro Code" that cannot be discussed in confidence with another Bro, and I would urge a Bro to seek permission from another Bro before doing something, or someone, that he feels might violate this sacred code. Note: A great time to get that permission is when your Bro is super drunk… like almost passed out.

If and when a violation occurs, a Bro has the right to administer the offending Bro a level of punishment befitting the infraction. He may choose from the Approved Punishments list.

APPROVED PUNISHMENTS

• Revocation of wingman status

• Text blackout

• Designated all-time tip leaver

• Assigned to solar-refraction seat in living room

• Removal from inappropriate email forwards list

• Waterboarding

• Temporary blacklist from barbecues/football Sundays

• Loss of permanent shotgun status

• Bumped from top position on "not using season tickets" list

• Removal from holiday card mailing list

• Revocation of airport pickup/drop-off privileges

• Must help offended Bro move heavy furniture

• Temporary removal from usual golf foursome

• Must return stuff loaned from offended Bro… even stuff he

• thinks his Bro forgot about

• No longer allowed to borrow the truck

• Offended Bro no longer required to bring beer over

Date: 2014-12-21; view: 984