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The Mobile-phone Ostrich Exception

Denial Rule

The denial rule requires us to avoid talking to strangers, or even making eye contact with them, or indeed acknowledging their presence in any way unless absolutely necessary. if English people see the same person every morning on the platform, and maybe quite often sit opposite them on the train, you might start to just nod to each other when you arrive, but that’s about as far as it goes. It can last for a year. it depends on some people more outgoing than the others. The problem with actually speaking to a fellow commuter was that if you did it once, you might be expected to do it again – and again, and again: having acknowledged the person’s existence. and you would have to find ways of avoiding the person

Exceptions to the Denial Rule. The Politeness Exception

The first situation is when not speaking would constitute a greater rudeness than the invasion of privacy by speaking – such as when one accidentally bumps into people and must apologize, or when one must say ‘excuse me’ to get past them, or ask if the seat next to them is free. Having made your necessary apology or request, you must immediately revert to the denial state, both parties pretending that the other does not exist.

The Information Exception

Whereby one may break the denial rule to ask for vital information, such as ‘Is this the right train for Paddington?’ The response can be humorous: as ‘Well, I certainly hope so!’ or ‘If it’s not, I’m in trouble!’ the same principle is to revert to the denial state once the necessary information has been imparted, the more humorous responses can sometimes indicate a greater willingness to exchange at least a few more words.

The Moan Exception

The ‘moan exception’ to the denial rule normally only occurs when something goes wrong – such as an announcement over the loudspeakers that the train or plane will be delayed or cancelled. A loudspeaker platform announcement of a delayed train prompts an immediate outbreak of sociable body language: people make eye contact; sigh noisily; exchange long-suffering smiles, shrugs, raised eyebrows and so on. Nowadays, you will also nearly always hear at least one comment containing the phrase ‘the wrong sort of leaves’, a reference to a now legendary excuse offered by the railway operators when ‘leaves on the track’ caused extensive disruption to a large part of the railway system.

Commuters know that they can share an enjoyable moan about a delayed train without incurring any obligation to talk to their fellow moaners again the next morning.

The Mobile-phone Ostrich Exception

On public transport, it is considered unseemly to draw attention to oneself. There are people who violate this rule, discuss loudly the details of their domestic or business affairs, matters that would normally be considered private or confidential. Part of the problem is that the English will not complain – not directly, to the person making the noise, only quietly to each other, or to colleagues when they get to work, or in letters to the newspapers. The train companies are aware of the issue, and some have sections of their trains as ‘quiet’ carriages, where the use of mobile phones is prohibited.



COURTESY RULESNegative-politeness’ Rules

The restraint, cautiousness and contact-avoidance of English public-transport passengers – the stand-offishness that foreigners complain about – are all characteristic features of ‘negative politeness’.


Date: 2016-03-03; view: 787


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