Chapter Twenty-three 4 page

“You don’t have to apologize, buddy.” She stepped closer to him, not wanting anyone to overhear them. “When you protect your mother or your sister, you’re just being the kid I hope I’m doing a good job of raising.”

“Even if it’s you I’m screaming at?”

“Even then. Just as long as you know I’m going to tell you when you’re wrong about something.” She stopped and turned him so they were facing each other. “No matter how upsetting any situation is in life, I hope you realize I’d never hit your mom or you.”

“I know that. Why didn’t you tell me I was wrong yesterday? Right away, I mean?”

“Because I was in shock. It won’t rank as one of my most stellar memories, so I’m sorry for not explaining better.”

“Are you okay now?”

From the corner of her eye she saw Libby and Bailey start walking again, so she jerked her head in their direction to get Ralph moving. “Not yet, but it has nothing to do with you or your sister. Your mother and I were together a long time, and it’ll take time for me to be okay with the reality that we’re not anymore.”

“Are you mad at her?”

“Yes, I am,” she said with no further elaboration.

“Me too.” Ralph looked toward the windows again. “But I’m madder at myself for making you feel bad about what happened. That was my bad.”

“You did what you thought was right in your heart, and that’s what counts. Don’t ever apologize for standing up for the people you love.”

When they arrived at the building Libby rode up with them, with Tully still carrying her book bag.

“Mom, we’re going back and I’m going to finish my term paper,” Bailey said. “We’re not going home real late, right?”

“Just tell me when you’re ready, and I’ll pack and finish up at home.”

Libby followed her down the long hallway to the office at the end. Tully asked, “Want something to drink?”

“Maybe later. For now let me enjoy seeing the inner sanctum for the first time,” Libby said as she turned full circle to take in all of Tully’s office. “This great view encourages me to study.”

“Once you’re finished with law school, I want the first crack at you.”

Libby glanced back from the view to see if Tully was serious and noticed that Tully’s head was down as she reviewed the stack of files on her desk. “Really? Do I give you the impression I’d make a good attorney?”

“You have the potential to be anything you want, and from our talks downstairs about law, I’d say you’re going to be a fabulous lawyer. The added bonus, of course, is that you know how to use the fancy espresso machine we bought for the break room.” Tully looked up after the jibe and winked.

“You’re just hilarious.” Trying to stay out of the way, Libby sat on the sofa. “If you’re busy I can go.”

“Not before you tell me what’s wrong.”

“I asked you first, remember?” She pointed to the other end of the couch. “So sit and tell me what’s bothering you.”

“I remember, but I don’t want to dump my troubles on you, Libby.”

She pointed to the seat again. “But you want me to dump mine on you? That hardly seems fair. Take a seat, Counselor. I asked because I wanted to help.”

“Something happened after I left the coffee shop yesterday.” Tully hesitated, then told the whole story, making Libby jump by smashing her fist into her other hand when she described briefly going home.

When Ralph had asked her if she was angry, Tully hadn’t elaborated, but Libby was smart enough to hear the venom in her voice. Tully wasn’t just angry, she was pissed.

“What happens now?”

“Great question, but I have no idea. I don’t think I can go back after that. Walking in on that scene in our bedroom killed the part of my heart that belonged to Jessica, you know what I mean?”

“After being together all this time, you still loved her a lot, didn’t you?”

Tully leaned forward and put her elbows on her knees so she could rest her chin on her hands. “Corny, I know, but yes.”

Libby put her hand on Tully’s back. “That’s sweet, not corny. I’ve never met your partner, but she’s a fool to have let what you two have go so easily over an affair.”

“Ah, well, enough about my pathetic life. Tell me what’s got you sounding a bit blue today.”

“My roommate’s getting married.”

Tully moved back in her seat to give Libby her full attention. “And you were in love with the guy or something?”

“Oh, God, no. I’m upset about losing the other half of the rent when she moves out. Tracy wasn’t the best roommate I’ve had, but she was quiet and seldom there. Studying at home was great.” Libby raised her hands as if in defeat and smiled. “Oh well, I guess I have time to get another job.”

“Libby, I don’t mean to pry, but won’t your folks help you out?”

“My mom and dad died a few years back, and not to complain, but all they left were a few debts.” She gazed up at the ceiling as if trying to control her emotions. “Sorry, that sounded awful, I know.”

“Don’t worry about how it sounded. Just tell me how I can help you. I don’t know your whole schedule, but how can you squeeze another job and school into your days?”

“I appreciate it, please don’t think that I don’t, but—” The intercom buzzed, interrupting Libby.

“Tully?” Roxanne’s voice came through.

“What’s up?” Tully pressed the button to respond.

“I hate to bother you, but Jessica’s here and is waiting to see you.”

“Keep her in the waiting room for a minute. I have to finish something first.” Tully kept her eyes on Libby.

“There’s nothing to finish, Tully. I’ll go,” Libby said as soon as Tully removed her finger from the intercom.

“You can go if you want, but I’d like for you to stay so we can talk about a few things.” Tully didn’t go back to the sofa, but did walk around the desk and sit on the edge of it.

“I’m not going to take a handout from you.”

“I may only buy coffee from you, but somehow I knew that you wouldn’t just accept money from me. That’s not what I had in mind, so please stay.”

“Okay, but if you want me to go and come back later, that’s all right too. You have enough to worry about without adding me to the list.”

“You’re one of the few people in my life who’s concerned about my stress level, which is refreshing.” Tully picked up Libby’s bag. “Come on, and I’ll put you in the room with the kids. Just don’t let Bailey talk you into writing her paper for her. The computers in there can access a couple of law libraries, so feel free to use one of them.”

Tully suddenly started worrying about Libby and whatever was bothering her, which was better than concentrating on the mess her life was currently in.

Chapter Eight

The door of the office closed, and Jessica sat in the same spot Libby had been occupying. She rolled her eyes when Tully sat behind the desk, transparently trying to get her to jump through her hoops and to make the visit as uncomfortable as possible. If they were going to talk without screaming at each other, Jessica was going to have to move to the chair across from Tully’s desk, which she conceded and did. After all, you didn’t live with someone as long as she had with Tully and not learn just what made them tick and, in this case, what made her such a wonderful attorney.

“What can I do for you?” Tully asked.

“When I went to pick up the kids they weren’t at school today.” Jessica folded her hands on her lap and tried to stay calm. “It’s not smart to give in to their whims, especially Bailey’s.”

“After you so kindly threw them out of your car yesterday, I thought a day off wasn’t too much to give in to.”

Jessica jerked her hands up and slammed them on Tully’s desk. “That’s not fair.”

“Honesty isn’t always fair, Jessica, so calm down.”

It irritated Jessica that the more out of control she became, the more relaxed Tully seemed to be.

“The kids are here today catching up on some schoolwork, as well as coming to grips with what’s going on in their lives. If you don’t agree with how I handled the situation, sue me.”

“Is that how you sold it to them?” Jessica almost screamed. She tried to calm herself by taking deep breaths but came close to hyperventilating when Tully went on.

“Why are you yelling?” Tully’s voice was quiet. “I’m sure you’ll disagree with me, but I’m the wronged party here.”

“Stop talking to me like an attorney.”

“I am an attorney, but I’ll try and simplify my speech if necessary.” Her voice was low but laced with sarcasm.

If Jessica prided herself on anything it was the level of her IQ, so she tried her best to let the comment go. “What I want is to talk about what happened.”

“How long have you been seeing her?”

“Do you really want to get into that?”

Tully kicked back in her chair and sighed. “Then what else is there to talk about?” She put her hand up again when Jessica’s mouth opened. “Wait, let me guess. You want me to tell you everything’s going to be all right. How I should be okay with what you’ve been doing for probably over a year. That I shouldn’t be upset that you were sharing a bed with me where your girlfriend had serviced you earlier.”

Jessica’s eyes dropped to her lap during the monotone delivery. “This isn’t all my fault, Tully. I wanted you at home, but this office has always held more allure than your family.”

“Stop before you drown in the bullshit you’re spouting. What we need to work out is how to sever our lives with as little fuss as possible.”

“We can do that, sure. I also wanted to thank you for taking the first step toward that peaceful split.”

“Have I?”

“You dropped the charges against Kara. She told me this afternoon before I came over here. Just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”

“Jessica, we have children.” Tully held up her index finger. “We are responsible for their welfare.” She raised another finger. “Those are the only things we’ll have to talk about from here on out.”

“Then why the olive branch of dropping the charges?”

“Do you want to see the kids?” Tully asked, ignoring the question. “I can call them in if you do.”

“Tully,” Jessica said again.

“We’re done unless you want to visit the kids.” Tully pressed the intercom for Roxanne. “Could you come show Jessica to the conference room, please.”

“What if I have more to talk about?” Jessica crossed her legs to imply that she wasn’t going anywhere.

“I suggest you call Dr. Nicolas if you’re feeling chatty. I really don’t care.”

Roxanne opened the door and stepped in without knocking. “Dr. Badeaux, are you ready?”

“No, I’m not,” Jessica answered but didn’t move.

“Jessica, you can follow Roxanne out of my office or I can call security and have them carry you out to the sidewalk,” Tully said. “I do hope you go with curtain number two. So much more entertaining, if you ask me.”

“No one’s asking, Tully.” Jessica stood up and walked past Roxanne, heading for the conference room.

“Thanks, Rox. Could you babysit for a second while I go get the kids?”

“Sure, just as long as I’m not expected to be civil by making small talk.”

Tully laughed as she got to her feet. “That would constitute hazard pay, and we can’t afford the rates.”

“Bummer, that’s a crappy thing to have happen to you,” Tully overheard Bailey say from outside the firm’s law library. “I wouldn’t worry about it. My mom will fix it.”

“Why would you think that?” Libby asked her.

“You’re friends, right?”

Libby nodded at Bailey’s question.

“Then Mom’ll fix it.”

“Fix what?” Tully asked.

“Nothing,” Libby said quickly.

“Uh-huh, we’ll see about that later, but right now your mama’s in the conference room, and she’d like to talk to you and Ralph.” Tully put her hands in her pockets and rocked on her feet, an old habit that popped up when she lectured. Some people paced, but she rocked in an effort to stay on point and keep from yelling, a strategy that usually worked.

“What does she want?” Bailey asked.

“I didn’t ask her, but I’m sure she wants to check and see that you’re all right.”

Ralph had clammed up and didn’t let go of the book he’d been reading. When Tully came in she’d noticed him glance up every other word to participate in Libby and Bailey’s conversation. Now he was obviously using his book as a shield.

“Ralph?” Tully called his name in an effort to lift his head. “You want me to go with you?”

“I don’t want to see her.”

“Buddy, she’s your mom. Nothing that happened yesterday changed that.”

“I know that, but I still don’t want to.”

“Okay, what about you, Bailey Bean?”

Bailey sat staring at her brother as if she didn’t realize Tully had asked her something. When she did react, Tully caught a glimpse of the sweet baby girl she remembered hidden in the eyes so much like her own.

“Why are you being so nice to us?”

Tully stopped rocking and jerked her hands out of her pockets and to her sides. “Where did that come from?”

“I want to know.”

“I’m not acting any different toward you, honey, and I’m not setting you up for anything. Why would you think otherwise?”

“I asked you a question first.” Bailey was getting angry.

“Take a chance, Bailey, and just tell me.” Tully put her hands on the table and leaned forward. “I’m not asking to punish you with the answer, but because I want us to be honest with each other. It’s the only way we can move forward, and I won’t let you down if you tell me what’s bothering you.”

“What do you care?” Bailey stood so fast her chair flew back. “When have you ever cared about me?”

“From the minute you were conceived. I know I haven’t done a bang-up job of listening lately, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you.” She knew her soft response sounded tired.

“You let Mama take us to that school because it was a status symbol,” started Bailey. “You let her make me go to parties because you knew the kids’ parents, not because anyone wanted me around. They wouldn’t have invited me otherwise. You never opened your mouth to take up for me, and now you’re just lying again.”

Tully was stunned at the river of words that had finally poured out of Bailey and how much baggage the kid was carrying. “What do you think I’m lying about?”

“You buttered us up today just so you could dump us the first chance you got.”

“I don’t understand, sweetheart. Why would you think that?”

Bailey pointed to Ralph. “He said he didn’t want to go, and I don’t either, but you’re going to make us so she’ll take us away.”

“Okay,” Tully said, stretching out the word. “If I leave for, like, five minutes, do you both promise not to go anywhere?”

Both kids nodded.

Tully walked out, leaving a thick tension behind her, then endured the screaming that erupted in the conference room. Jessica made numerous threats before she slammed out of the front door.

When Tully stepped back in, both kids opened their mouths to speak but she beat them to it. “I want everyone to be quiet. I have a few things to say.” She handed them and Libby her business card. “For the rest of today I don’t want you to think of me as Mom or coffee buyer, but as your attorney.”

“Why?” Ralph asked.

“When you have a problem, it’s good to talk to someone like me. You lay out your grievances and it’s my job to fix them. So, who wants to go first?”

No one volunteered, so Tully took Bailey by the hand and escorted her out, waving good-bye to everyone else.

When they were back in her office, Tully dropped onto the sofa. “I’m sorry, Bailey.”

“For what?”

“For letting you down in every way possible and for not doing anything about it sooner.” Taking a legal pad from the coffee table, she found her pen and wrote a few lines. “We need to agree on some things, okay? Okay?” she asked again when Bailey just stood there with her arms crossed.

“Okay.”

“First, your mama and I are probably going to have a lot more of those screaming matches you just heard, but at no time should you think that any of what’s going on has to do with you.”

“What does it have to do with, then? You keep saying it has nothing to do with us, but you don’t say what it does have to do with.”

“My relationship with your mother ended yesterday afternoon. I know you want the gory details, but as a favor to me and my ego, could you just let me stop there for now?”

Bailey nodded and Tully took a deep breath and kept going. “I plan to keep you and Ralph with me no matter what your mama decides to do in the future. It’s not always going to be easy, and I’m sure we’ll disagree on more things than we agree on, but I’m not ever giving up when it comes to you and your brother.”

“More dialogue would be good here. The lawyer-speak is lame, so spell it out for me.”

“I love you, Bailey, and I want you in my house, in my life, and in my heart. So promise me that from now on when someone tells you something, and I don’t care who tells you otherwise, you come ask me before you take it for the truth.” Tully waited for Bailey’s tension-filled body to relax, but she showed no sign of calming down. “The next thing we have to talk about is this—you have to be in school.”

Bailey threw her hands up and yelled, “Weren’t you listening to a damn word I said?”

“I think we can manage this discussion without cursing at each other, so listening before attacking would be helpful. I said you have to be in school, not necessarily the one you attend now. All right?”

“Do I get to pick?”

“We’ll get to that, but I want to talk to you about something else.” She patted the cushion next to her. “I look at you and see a beautiful young woman who’s smart and kind. Why don’t you have any friends?”

“Because of Liza Williams.”

“Victor and Joyce’s kid?” Tully scrunched her brows together. “What does she have to do with it?”

“She’s the one who made sure everyone in school knows Ralph and I are the kids of the gay couple. If anyone’s our friend it means they’re gay too, so we don’t have a lot of those.”

Tully snapped the pencil she was holding. “Did you tell your mother all this?”

“I did a couple of times, but she told me it’d get better and to not fight back.”

She snapped the piece of pencil that remained in her hand. “Why not fight back?”

“Because it gives you a bad reputation,” Bailey said, doing a good imitation of Jessica.

“I want you to give me a day, okay?” Tully dropped the splintered pencil and stood up.

“For what?”

Tully put her hands on Bailey’s shoulders and squeezed gently. “I have an idea, and I need a day to set it up. All I ask is for you to consider what I’m thinking and not just blow it off because you’re mad at me.”

“What about Mama?”

“Leave your mother to me. You just worry about you and I’ll take care of the rest.” She didn’t let go of Bailey, just pressed her closer. “I’m sorry I’ve been too self-involved to do something about this sooner. I’ll do better, but if I’m falling down on the job, let me know, okay?”

“What about Mama?”

“What about her?”

“Are you going to force us to see her if we don’t want to?”

“How about you wait until tomorrow so you can see I’m working in good faith, as they say. Then we’ll talk about seeing your mom.”

Bailey raised her head and looked at her without blinking. “Do you swear this isn’t just a bunch of bull?”

“I don’t blame you for not trusting me, but I’m asking for one more chance.”

“Okay.”

Tully sighed in relief, then walked Bailey back so she could have the same talk with Ralph. As successful as she’d been in her professional life, just one afternoon convinced her how poorly she’d done with her family. For so long, she’d thought she was contributing by making a living. That philosophy had cost her children in ways that sobered her.

After Tully finished with Ralph, Libby walked into her office to find her lying on the sofa with an arm over her eyes. “Rough day?”

“I just found out I have kids.”

Bypassing the chairs, Libby chose to sit on the coffee table. “Don’t beat yourself up too much. They’re great.”

“Not because of too much input from me.” With a grunt she sat up and took a deep breath. “But there’s no reason to burden you with all my problems.”

“Why not? Like I said before, that’s why you wanted me to stay, isn’t it? So I could burden you with mine.”

“I have a feeling your problems are a little easier to solve, so let me ask you something. I know you work downstairs, then somewhere else, and you squeeze school in between. Are you really fond of the two jobs?”

Libby laughed and moved to the sofa. “The coffee gig is great because it includes health insurance. The warehouse job is mindless and physically hard, but in a way it gives me a mental break.” She combed a strand of hair behind her left ear. “Why do you ask?”

“How would you like to come work for me?”

“Doing what? Making coffee?” Libby put her hand on Tully’s shoulder. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but I can’t accept.”

“You’re beginning to remind me of Bailey. Quick to jump to the final answer before you’ve heard all the facts. Once you graduate, you need to lose that habit in a hurry. Clients have a way of not liking their attorney to decide certain things about them before she gathers all the facts.” Tully sat back and put her feet on the table, trying to make the pain in her back go away. “You’ve got a year and a half left before you finish, right?”

“If I survive, yeah.”

“You need the degree, but where do you think you’ll learn the most law? With Lange or with me?” She smiled, but she was so tired her lips barely moved. “I had an internship like I’m offering you when I was in school, and it was invaluable when I started practicing law. It’s just an idea, though, not an ultimatum. Don’t worry about saying no.”

“Please don’t think I’m not grateful. Can I think about it?”

“There’s no deadline attached, so ponder all you want.” Tully stood and offered her a hand up. “You have class tonight?”

“At six, but just the one.” Libby glanced at her watch and grimaced. “I’d better leave so I can finish my reading.”

“Thanks for listening to me and for having lunch with us. The kids really enjoyed it.”

As if on impulse, Libby hugged her. “Thanks for caring.”

She walked out right afterward, leaving Tully feeling lonely. She hadn’t had physical contact with another person in so long that she didn’t realize how much she missed the closeness.

When Jessica had started to drift away, Tully hadn’t bothered to notice how long their separation had lasted until she realized the gulf between them couldn’t be breached. Especially when someone else who obviously seemed so much more exciting and fresh was ready to take her place.

“You’re an idiot, Tully, and that girl thinks you’re desperate for friends.” Tully stared at the closed door as she spoke out loud about Libby.

Chapter Nine

“Mom, you have to stop falling asleep down here,” Bailey said the next morning.

Tully was on the sofa again, fully dressed except for her shoes, the ever-present ashtray overflowing on the coffee table. She and the kids had gone out for Chinese, then she’d worked from home until they went to bed.

Piles of paperwork had appealed to her far more than facing what was behind the closed door of the master bedroom. “Are we selling the couch or something?”

“It’s not good for your back, so cut it out. Should I get Ralph up for school?”

“One more vacation day, sort of, then back to the grind on Monday. I want to show you something, so it’s not a total day off, okay?” She had to raise her voice for the last part because Bailey was already running up the stairs.

Tully followed at a slower pace, heading for the shower. When she finished and walked into the bedroom, she stared at the bed with its rumpled sheets and missing pillows. It was a shrine to what she needed to fix in her life.

A knock on the bedroom door broke though her stupor, and she moved to the closet for her robe. When she opened the door, Bailey stood there, still in her pajamas.

“Do you want to use our bathroom?”

“Who are you and what have you done with my surly kid?” Tully teased, then hugged Bailey. “Thanks for looking out for me.”

“I’m tight with the fact that we’ll be better off with you.”

The honesty made Tully laugh. “Don’t worry, Bailey Bean. I’ll try my best not to crack up on you.”

“If you do, Ralph and I will do our best to keep you glued, even if you require heavy medication.”

“Go on, comedian, so you can beat Ralph into the bathroom.”

Bailey’s eyes strayed to the bed like they had the day before. “Can I tell you something else?”

“Sure, what?”

“When we get back from wherever we’re going, can we talk some more about what happens next?”

“We have plenty of time to talk about anything you want, honey.” Tully put her hand on Bailey’s chin and gently tilted her head so their eyes met. “It’s really going to be okay.” She figured the kids would get tired of hearing that line before things returned to normal.

Tully parked in the first space she found around Tulane University’s main square. Bailey and Ralph flanked her as soon as they stepped out, their heads like oscillating fans, trying to figure out where they were headed.

The building at one corner differed from the rest in that small children were playing in the fenced yard. Tully started in that direction.

“Two years ago, Tulane started an experiment to give their education majors a good training ground by establishing University High.” She pointed to the large building.

“But it’s full of little kids,” Ralph said.

“It’s preschool through high school, buddy.” They arrived at the gate where a woman in her late thirties was waiting. “I’m just asking you to take the tour, okay?”

“Good morning.” The woman held her hand out to Tully first, but didn’t ignore the kids. “I’m Kim Paler, the administrator. Welcome to our campus.”

Though the first large building housed the elementary classes, it was part of Kim’s tour. A slightly larger building next door housed the high school, which consisted of grades seven through twelve. Throughout the tour a few students came up to talk to Bailey and Ralph and offered to answer any questions.

Kim finished her tour and walked them back to their meeting place; then, after a few more pleasantries, she excused herself.

“Let’s go to the student union for something to drink,” Tully offered.

Once they were seated at a table she waited for one of them to ask questions, and Bailey didn’t disappoint.

“Why are we here?”

“Even before all our family drama started, I noticed you weren’t exactly thrilled to go to school most mornings, so I did a little homework on alternatives. I want you to get a good education, but I don’t want you to get beaten down in the process, so I thought you might consider giving this place a try.”

“Why this place?” Ralph asked as he played with his mug.

“Because unlike the kids you go to school with now, the students here at U High have much more diversified social backgrounds. That means—”

“We know what ‘diverse’ means, Mom,” Bailey said.

“Some of the kids come from families with two dads or two moms. When you aren’t the only two in school with that distinction, you usually aren’t a novelty.” Tully held their hands. “I’m not forcing this change on you, but I want you to think about it.”

“You’d really let us switch?” Bailey asked.

“That’s why we’re here, but it’s your decision.” She turned to Ralph. “What about you, buddy?”

“Do I have to?”

“Of course not. If you’re happy with school now, then so be it.”

“Ralph, who are you kidding?” Bailey wore an incredulous expression.

“Okay, Bailey, he gets the same consideration you do, so don’t pressure him.”

“But he’s as sick of that place as I am, so why be an idiot now?”

Bailey stopped talking when Tully raised her hand.

“Ralph, I want you to be honest with me, okay? I’m not going to lie to you—our future is going to be different. You’re going to have to spend time with your mom and me separately, and that might not always be great.”

“I said I didn’t want to go and see her.”

Tully leaned back in her chair. “She’s your mom, son, and you can’t avoid her forever, but I’m not going to force you until you’re ready. However, you should have one place in your life where you aren’t completely unhappy.” She wrapped her hands around her half-full cup of coffee. “I thought U High would be a good fit for you, but you don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“I do,” Bailey said. “And I want you to think about it, Ralph. You know you want to.” When he shook his head, she tried another tactic. “Mom, could you get us some donuts?”

From the Krispy Kreme display Tully watched the exchange that ensued. Bailey had spent most of Ralph’s life teasing him unmercifully, but she was very protective of him when anyone else tried to give him any grief. No way would she desert him.

Date: 2016-01-03; view: 499