INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Dear 304 — Just got your latest SOS. Don't let them lead you by the nose. They're testing you. Sit on them from the first moment to show you're boss; they can find out later how nice you really are. There is no such thing as an Early Dismissal Monitor or a Permanent Pass to the Water Fountain.

Bea

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Dear Syl — Serves you right! Never turn your back to the class when writing on the board— learn the overhead backhand. Never give a lesson on "lie and lay." Never raise your voice; let them stop talking to hear you. Never give up. And to thine own self be true.

(There is no such thing as a Social Intercourse Period!)

Bea

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 304

TO: 508

Dear Bea—

What's a PRC?

Syl

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Dear Syl—

Sorry I couldn't answer sooner; was busy disentangling a kid from a wrong program.

PRC is the Permanent Record Card; in it you will find the CC, or "Capsule Characterization" — a pregnant phrase composed about each student at the end of each term by his homeroom teacher. In the PRC is the PPP (It almost sings, doesn't it?). That's the "Pupil Personality Profile", invented by Ella Friedenberg, Guidance Counselor. She thinks she's Freud, but actually, she's Peeping Tom. She has based her PPP's on such interviews with kids as: "Why do you hate your parents?" "What is your sexual problem?" Avoid her. Also avoid McHabe — he's in charge of Discipline and Supplies. He can't bear to part with a paper clip; ask him for a red pencil and he blanches. Dr. Clarke will avoid you. He's really a Mr. but prefers, for reasons of prestige, to be called Dr. Do so. He exists mainly as a signature on the circulars; sometimes he materializes in assembly and makes a speech on "Education For Life"; occasionally he conducts important visitors through the school. Most of the kids think Grayson is principal: he's the distinguished gentleman with the white mane who is "The Custodial

Staff." If your ceiling should fall down, send a note to the basement. He'll probably say he isn't there, but at least you've tried.

Crumple this piece of paper into a small ball and swallow it!

Bea

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 304

TO: 508

Dear Bea — Paper swallowed. Who is Paul Barringer?

Syl

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Glamor boy of Eng. Dept. Unpublished Writer. He drinks too much, such men are dangerous. He'll woo you with rhymes. Now you're on your own.

Bea

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION—

FROM: 304

TO: 508

Dear Bea — Can we meet for a smoke in the Teachers' Lounge between classes? I've got to talk to an adult!

Syl

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Dear Innocent — So-called Teachers' Lounge is Supply Room in basement. Has beat-up couch someone once donated; also sink and chair. But can't be used because of steam pipes in ceiling. Besides, smoking there is against fire regulations. Only place to smoke is Women's Toilet on third floor landing. Let's meet there right after 6th period. Get key to toilet from Sadie Finch. We'll have four whole minutes — if we're lucky and traffic in halls is with us. Sorry I can't come down now — trying to dissuade salvageable youngster from quitting school.

Bea

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 304

TO: 508

Dear Bea—

What am I supposed to do about the number of basketballs I need?

Syl

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Nothing. Notice was put in your box by mistake.

Health Ed teacher is right under you.

Bea

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 304

TO: 508

Dear Bea — I am about to send in my registers to Bester: I've got unexcused students, unauthorized students, non-authenticated students, illegitimate students, loitering students and absent students — and still they add up to 223 in my subject classes, besides the 46 in my homeroom. Will someone drop out tomorrow? Will it be I?

Syl

* * *

INTRASCHOOL COMMUNICATION

FROM: 508

TO: 304

Don't you dare! We need you! This is just the first day; you'll get used to it. The rewards will come later, from the kids themselves — and from the unlikeliest ones.

Bea

Date: 2016-01-03; view: 1013