Me: I’m fine. Woods is my boss. No big deal.

Rush: I’m sorry about Woods.

Why was he sorry? He had no reason to be sorry.

Me: I’m fine. Woods is my boss. No big deal.

I slipped the phone back into my pocket and headed to my next stop.

Chapter Twenty

A driveway full of cars was not something I expected when I pulled into Rush’s after work. The golf course had gotten so busy that I’d only stopped to give them drinks one more time on the sixteenth hole. He hadn’t texted me again all day. My stomach knotted up nervously. Was this it? Had his brief moment of sweetness after taking my virginity faded away so soon?

I had to park out on the edge of the road. Closing my truck door, I started the trek to the door.

“You don’t want to go in there,” Grant’s familiar voice said in the darkness. I looked around and saw a small orange glow fall to the ground then get put out under a boot before Grant stepped out of his hiding spot.

“Do you come to these parties to hang around outside?” I asked, since this was the second time I’d arrived at a party here to find Grant outside alone.

“I can’t seem to quit smoking. Rush thinks I’ve stopped. So I hide out here when I need a smoke,” he explained.

“Smoking will kill you,” I told him, remembering all the smokers that I’d watched slowly dying when I took my mother to chemo treatments.

“That’s what they tell me,” he replied with a sigh.

I looked back at the house and heard the music pouring out of it. “I didn’t know there was a party tonight,” I said, hoping the disappointment in my voice didn’t come through.

Grant laughed and leaned a hip against a Volvo. “Isn’t there always a party here?”

No, there wasn’t. After last night I thought Rush would have called me or texted me. “I guess I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“I don’t think Rush was either. This is a Nan party. She sprung it on him. The girl has always managed to get away with murder where Rush is concerned. I got my ass kicked by Rush more than once growing up because I didn’t fall for her wounded puppy shit.”

I walked over to lean against the Volvo beside him and crossed my arms. “So you grew up with Nan, too?” I needed something. Any kind of explanation.

Grant cut his eyes at me. “Yeah. Of course. Georgianna is her momma. Only parent she’s got. Well…” Grant pushed off from the Volvo and shook his head. “Nope. You almost had me. I can’t tell you shit, Blaire. Honestly when someone does I don’t want to be anywhere around.”

Grant stalked back toward the house.

I watched him until he was back inside before I made my way to the house. I prayed no one was in my room. If they were I was going to the pantry. I was not in the mood for Nan. Or the secrets surrounding Nan that everyone but me was allowed to know. I sure wasn’t in the mood for Rush.

I opened the door and was glad that no one was standing around to see me arrive. I headed straight for the stairs. Laughter and voices filled the house. I didn’t fit in with them. There was no use in going down there and acting like I did.

I glanced at the door leading to Rush’s stairs and let last night’s memories wash over me. I was beginning to think that was a one-time thing. I opened my door and stepped in before I turned on the light.

I covered my mouth from the scream that bubbled up when I realized I wasn’t alone. It was Rush. He was sitting on my bed looking out the window. He stood up when I closed the door and walked over to me.

“Hey,” he said in a soft voice.

“Hey,” I replied, unsure as to why he was in my room when he had a house full of people. “What are you doing in here?”

He gave me a crooked smile. “Waiting on you. I kinda thought that was obvious.”

Smiling, I ducked my head. His eyes could be too much sometimes. “I can see that. But you have guests.”

“Not my guests. Trust me, I wanted an empty house,” he said cupping the side of my face with his hand. “Come upstairs with me. Please.”

He didn’t have to beg. I’d go gladly. I dropped my purse on the bed and tucked my hand in his. “Lead the way.”

Rush squeezed my hand and we headed up the stairs together.

Once we reached the top step Rush pulled me into his arms and kissed me hard. Maybe I was easy but I didn’t care. I’d missed him today. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back with all the emotion churning inside me that I didn’t quite understand.

When he broke the kiss we were both breathless. “Talk. We are going to talk first. I want to see you smile and laugh. I want to know what your favorite show was when you were a kid and who made you cry at school and what boy band you hung posters of on your wall. Then I want you naked in my bed again.”

Smiling at his strange, but adorable, way of telling me he wanted to do more than just have sex with me, I walked over to the large tan sectional sofa that overlooked the ocean instead of a television.

“Thirsty?” Rush asked, walking over to a stainless steel refrigerator I hadn’t taken the time to notice last night. A small bar sat off to the side of it.

“Just some ice water would be nice,” I replied.

Rush went to work fixing drinks and I turned to look out at the ocean. “Rugrats was my favorite show, Ken Norris made me cry at least once a week but then he’d make Valerie cry and I’d get mad and hurt him. My favorite and most successful attack was a swift kick to the balls. And shamefully, The Backstreet Boys covered my walls.”

Rush stopped beside me and handed me a tall glass of ice water. I could see the indecision on his face. He sat down beside me. “Who is Valerie?”

I’d mentioned my sister without thinking. I was comfortable with Rush. I wanted him to know me. Maybe if I opened up about my secrets he would share his. Even if he couldn’t share Nan’s.

“Valerie was my twin sister. She died in a car accident five years ago. My dad was driving. Two weeks later, he walked out of our lives and never returned. Mom said we had to forgive him because he couldn’t live with the fact he’d been driving the car that killed Valerie. I always wanted to believe her. Even when he didn’t come to Mom’s funeral I wanted to believe he just couldn’t face it. So I forgave him. I didn’t hate him or let bitterness and hate control me. But I came here and well… you know. I guess Mom was wrong.”

Rush leaned forward and set his glass on the rustic wooden table beside the couch and slipped his arm behind me. “I had no idea you had a twin sister,” he said almost reverently.

“We were identical. You couldn’t tell us apart. We had a lot of fun with that at school and with boys. Only Cain could tell us apart.”

Rush began to play with a lock of my hair as we sat there looking out over the water. “How long did your parents know each other before they married?” he asked. Not a question I was expecting.

“It was a love at first sight kind of thing. Mom was visiting a friend of hers in Atlanta. Dad had recently broken up with her friend and he came around one night when Mom was at her friend’s apartment alone. Her friend was a little wild from what my mom said. Dad took one look at mom and he was sunk. I can’t blame him. My mom was gorgeous. She had my color hair but she had the biggest green eyes. They were like jewels almost and she was just fun. You were happy just to be near her. Nothing ever got her down. She smiled through everything. The only time I saw her cry was when she was told about Valerie. She crumpled to the floor and wailed that day. It would have frightened me if I hadn’t felt the same way. It was like part of my soul had been ripped out.” I stopped. My eyes were burning. I’d let myself get carried away with opening up. I hadn’t opened up to anyone in years.

Rush rested his forehead on the top of my head. “I’m so sorry, Blaire. I had no idea.”

For the first time since Valerie had left me I felt like someone was there I could talk to. I didn’t have to hold back. I turned in his arms and found his lips with mine. I needed this closeness. I’d remembered the pain and now I needed him to make it go away. He was so good at making everything but him fade away.

“I love them. I will always love them but I’m okay now. They’re together. They have each other,” I told him when I felt his reluctance to kiss me back.

“Who do you have?” he asked in a tortured voice.

“I have me. I found out three years ago when my mom got sick that as long as I held onto me and didn’t forget who I was that I’d always be okay,” I replied.

Rush closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes the desperate look in them startled me. “I need you. Right now. Let me love you right here, please.”

I pulled my shirt off and then reached for his. He lifted his arms for me as I pulled his shirt over his head. He made quick work of my bra and it was gone with nothing between us. His hands cupped my breasts as he brushed his thumb over each hard crest. “You are so fucking unbelievably gorgeous. Inside and out,” he whispered. “As much as I don’t deserve it I want to be buried inside you. I can’t wait. I just need to get as close to you as I can get.”

I scooted back from him and stood up. After slipping off my shoes, I unsnapped my shorts and pushed them down along with my panties then stepped out of them. He sat there watching me like I was the most fascinating thing he had ever seen. It felt powerful. The embarrassment I expected to feel from standing naked in front of him wasn’t there.

“Get naked,” I said, looking down at his erection pressing against his jeans.

I thought that would get an amused chuckle from him but it didn’t. He stood up, quickly stepping out of his jeans and then sank back down on the couch pulling me with him.

“Straddle me,” he instructed. I did as I was told. “Now,” he gulped, “ease down on me.” I looked down and saw him holding the base of his cock. I grabbed onto his shoulders and slowly lowered myself as he handled everything else.

“Easy, baby. Slow and easy. You’re gonna be sore.”

I nodded and bit my bottom lip as the tip started to enter me. He moved the head back and forth over my opening, teasing me. I squeezed his shoulders and gasped. It felt good. So very good.

“That’s it. You’re getting so fucking wet. God, I want to taste it,” he growled.

Seeing the animalistic look in his eyes flipped a switch in me. I wanted to make him remember me. Remember this. I knew our time was limited and I knew I’d never forget him. Still, I wanted to know that when he walked away he’d never forget me. I didn’t want to be that one girl whose virginity he took.

Leaning forward, I waited until he rubbed the head against my entrance. Then I sank down hard with a loud cry as it filled me.

“SHIT,” Rush shouted. I didn’t wait for him to worry about me. I was going to ride him. I understood the terminology now. I was in control of this. He started to open his mouth and say something but I stopped him by plunging my tongue into his mouth while I lifted my hips and sank back down onto him again harder. The groan and buckling sensation of his body under me assured me I was doing something right.

I broke apart so I could cry out as I began riding him faster and harder. The tenderness inside me was screaming out with the stretching of his entrance but it was a good pain.

“Blaire, oh holy fuck Blaire,” he ground out as his hands grabbed my hips and he let himself break free and enjoy the ride. His hands began taking over. He lifted me and slammed me back down onto him with fast and hard thrusts. Every curse and loud moan that escaped him made me wilder. I needed this with him.

The orgasm was building and I knew after a few more thrusts I was going to break apart on top of him. I wanted him to come too. I began rocking on him and letting out the loud cries I had been trying to control. “I’m gonna come,” I moaned as the sensation built.

“Fuck baby, so good,” he growled and then we both fell over the top together. His body bucked underneath me and then stilled. My name tore from his lips at the same time my body reached its climax.

When the tremors slowed and I could breathe again I wrapped my arms around his neck and collapsed on top of him.

Both his arms held me tightly to him as his breathing slowed. I liked the sweet sex we’d had last night but there was something to be said for fucking. I smiled to myself at the thought and turned my head to kiss his neck.

“Never. Never in all my life,” he panted running his hand down my back and cupping my bottom with a gentle squeeze. “That was. God, Blaire, I don’t have words.”

Smiling into his neck I knew I’d made my mark on this perfect, wounded, mysterious confusing man.

“I believe the word you are looking for is epic,” I said laughing as I leaned back so that I could look at him.

The tenderness in his eyes melted my heart a little more. “The most epic sex ever known to man,” he replied and reached out to tuck hair behind my ears. “I’m ruined. You know that right? You’ve ruined me.”

I wiggled my hips and I could feel him still inside me. “Hmmm no, I think you might still work.”

“God, woman you’re gonna have me hard and ready again. I need to clean you up.”

I traced his bottom lip with the pad of my finger. “I won’t bleed again. I did that already.”

Rush pulled my finger into his mouth and sucked on it gently before letting it go. “I wasn’t wearing a condom. I’m clean, though. I always wear a condom and I get checked regularly.”

I wasn’t sure how to process this. I hadn’t been thinking about a condom.

“I’m sorry. You got naked and my brain kind of checked out. I promise you I’m clean.”

I shook my head. “No, it’s okay. I believe you. I didn’t think about it either.”

Rush pulled me back against him. “Good because that was fucking unbelievable. I’ve never felt it without a condom. Knowing I was in you and feeling you bare makes me real damn happy. You felt amazing. All hot and wet and so very tight.”

I rocked against him. His dirty words in my ear made my ache wake back up. “Mmm,” I replied as I felt him grow hard again inside me.

“Are you on any birth control?”

I never had a reason to be. I shook my head.

He groaned and moved my hips off him until he was out of me. “We can’t do that again until you are. But you’ve got me all hard again.” He reached between my legs and ran a finger against my swollen clit. “So sexy,” he murmured. I let my head fall back and enjoyed his soft touch.

“Blaire, come take a shower with me,” he asked in a strained voice.

“Okay,” I said, looking back at him. He helped me up and then led me to his bigger than life bathroom.

“I want you in the shower. What we did out there was the best fucking I’ve ever had in my life. But in here it’s gonna be slower. I’m taking care of you.”

Chapter Twenty- One

Leaving Rush in bed this morning had been hard. He’d been sleeping so peacefully I hadn’t wanted to wake him up. I’d refrained from kissing his face before I left. Asleep he seemed so worry free. I didn’t realize how intense and on guard he was until I’d watched him sleep and seen him completely at peace.

Opening the door to the staffroom I was greeted to the smell of fresh donuts and a smiling Jimmy.

“Good morning sunshine,” he said cheerily as always.

“That remains to be seen… are you gonna share those donuts or not?”

He held the box out to me. “I bought two extras just for you doll. I knew my blond bombshell was coming to work today and I didn’t want to be empty handed.”

I sat down across from him and reached for my donut. “If I thought you’d enjoy it I’d kiss your face,” I teased.

Jimmy wiggled his eyebrows, “Who knows, baby? A face like yours can lead a man astray.”

Laughing, I took a bite of the fluffy warm goodness. This wasn’t healthy but it was so dang good.

“Eat up because we got us a long ass day ahead. The debutante ball is tonight and we won’t be in the dining room. We’ll all be sent to the ballroom and forced to walk around with trays of food and then serve them all at a sit down dinner.”

Debutante ball? What the heck was that? “Is that why there are so many trucks outside with flowers and decorations?”

Jimmy nodded and reached for another chocolate covered donut. “Yep. Happens every year during this week. Crazy rich mommas strut their daughters around and introduce them to society. After tonight, the girls will be considered women and treated as an adult member of the club. They can be on committees and the like. It’s crazy ass bullshit is what it is. Especially since Nan turned twenty-one a few weeks back. That means she gets to be released into mother fucking adulthood.”

Nan was a debutante. That was interesting. Her mother wasn’t here. Did this mean she was returning? My heart sped up… I’d have to leave soon. Rush hadn’t told me that anything had changed about my moving out. When I left would he still see me?

“Breathe, Blaire. It’s just a damn ball,” Jimmy said. I took a deep breath. I hadn’t realized I’d started to panic. This is why I’d wanted to keep my distance. I knew this day was coming. Would my dad be home today then?

“What time does it start?” I managed to ask without a hitch in my voice.

“Seven but they will close down the dinning at five to get us ready.”

I nodded and put the rest of my donut down. I couldn’t finish it. Today would be a waiting game. I felt the phone in my pocket but I couldn’t text Rush. I didn’t want him to tell me any bad news through a text message. I’d just wait.

“Blaire, I need to see you a moment in my office,” Woods’ voice broke into my thoughts. My eyes shot to Jimmy’s and his were wide with concern. Great. What had I done?

I stood up and turned to face Woods. He didn’t look angry. He smiled at me and it gave me the courage I needed to walk toward him. He held the door open for me and I stepped out into the hall.

“Relax, Blaire. You aren’t in trouble. We just need to discuss tonight.”

Oh. Whew. I took a deep breath and nodded then followed him to a door at the end of the hall.

“I don’t get anything glamorous. Dad believes in making me work my way to the top. Even if I’ll inherit the club one day.” Woods rolled his eyes while opening the office door and waved me inside. The room was as large as my bedroom at Rush’s. It had two large picture windows overlooking the eighteenth hole.

Woods walked over to sit on the edge of his desk instead of behind it. I appreciated his trying not to make this very formal. That would make me nervous.

“The Debutante Ball is tonight. It is an annual event around here. We make spoiled little rich bitches into adults. It’s a stupid pain in the ass that makes the club over fifty million dollars in profits with fees, donations and the like. So we can’t stop the nonsense. Not that my mother would if she could. She was a debutante once upon a time and you’d think she had been crowned queen of England to hear her talk about it.”

I wasn’t feeling better about tonight. This explanation was making it worse.

“Nan is twenty- one now. So, she’ll be a debutante. I looked over the line up and Rush will be her escort; it’s traditional for the girl’s father or older brother to escort her. The escort must also be a member of the club. I don’t know what is going on with you and Rush but I do know that Nan hates you. I don’t need drama tonight. I do however, need you. You’re one of our best. Question is, can you do this without a catfight? Because Nan will do her best to push your buttons. It will be all on you to ignore it. You may be dating a member but you’re the help. Doesn’t change that. The member is always right. The club will have to side with Nan if a fight were to break out.”

What was he expecting? This wasn’t high school. We were all adults. I could ignore Nan and Rush all night if need be.

“I can do this. No problem.”

Woods gave a brisk nod. “Good, because the pay is excellent and you need the experience.”

“I can do it,” I reassured him.

Woods stood up. “I’m trusting that you can. You can go help Jimmy with breakfast now. He is probably cursing us both.”

The rest of the day flew by and I was so busy with preparations that had no time to think about Nan or my father’s return. Or Rush. Now I was standing in the kitchen with every other server on staff. I was in a white and black server dress with my hair pulled up onto my head in a bun. I was beginning to get butterflies in my stomach.

This was the first time I’d have to face the differences between Rush and me. His world versus mine. They would collide tonight. I had prepared myself for any remarks Nan might make about me. I had even spoken with Jimmy about being a buffer and keeping me from having to go near Nan. I wanted to see Rush or even speak to him but I had a feeling that would be frowned on.

“Show time. Hors d'oeuvres and drinks people. You know your job. Let’s go.” Darla was running the show tonight backstage. I picked up my tray of martinis and headed for the line-up at the door. Everyone left quickly and we all made different paths through the crowd. Mine was a semicircle clockwise. Unless I saw Nan, then I turned counterclockwise and Jimmy went clockwise. It was a good plan. I just hoped it worked.

The first couple I walked up to didn’t even acknowledge me as they chatted and took a drink from the tray. That was easy enough. I made it through several more groups. Some of the men and women I recognized from the golf course. They would always nod and smile when they noticed me but that was it.

Halfway through the room my tray was empty and I made a mental note of the stopping point. I hurried back to the kitchen for more drinks. Darla was waiting for me. She shoved a new tray of martinis at me and shooed me away.

I made it back to my spot only having to stop twice and allow someone to get a drink off the tray. Mr. Jenkins called out my name and waved. I smiled back at him. He played eighteen holes every Friday and Saturday. It amazed me that a ninety-year-old man could get around that well. He also came in for coffee black and two poached eggs Monday through Friday mornings.

As I turned back from smiling his way my eyes locked with Rush’s. I had tried hard not to look for him although I knew he was here. It was Nan’s big night. Rush wouldn’t miss it. No reason he should. She was mean but she was his sister. It was me she detested. Not him.

His face looked pained and his small smile was forced. I smiled back at him trying really hard not to think about his weird greeting. At least he had looked my way. I hadn’t known what to expect from him.

Doctor and Mrs. Wallace both greeted me and told me they missed seeing me on the golf course. I lied and told them I missed it too. Then I headed back to the kitchen for yet another tray.

Darla shoved a tray with champagne at me, “Go, go, hurry,” she barked.

I walked as swiftly as I could with a tray full of champagne flutes. Once in the ballroom I started my same path again through members who were deeper in conversations and I was just a tray of drinks. I liked this better. I didn’t feel on edge.

Bethy’s familiar giggle caught my attention and I turned to look for her. I hadn’t seen her in the kitchen earlier. I’d assumed Darla hadn’t wanted her to work this function. Or Woods’ dad hadn’t.

Bethy wasn’t dressed like us. She had on a clingy black chiffon dress and her long brown hair was piled up on her head with ringlets hanging down around her face. She turned her head, catching my eyes, and she broke into a huge grin. I watched as she hurried over to me. The stiletto heels she was wearing didn’t even slow her down.

“Can you believe that I’m here as a guest?” Bethy asked, looking around us in awe and then back at me. I shook my head because I couldn’t.

“When Jace came to my apartment on his knees and begging last night I told him if he wanted me he had to claim me as his girlfriend in public. He agreed and well, you get the picture. Things got real hot up in my apartment. But anyways here I am,” she gushed.

Jace had manned up. Good for him. I glanced over her shoulder to see Jace watching us. I smiled at him and nodded my approval. He flashed me a crooked grin with a shrug.

“I’m glad to know he got some sense knocked into him,” I replied.

Bethy squeezed my arm. “Thank you,” she whispered.

She didn’t have anything to thank me for but I smiled. “Go have a good time. I’ve got to get these all passed out before your aunt comes out here and catches me talking.”

“Okay. I will, I wish you could enjoy it with me, though.” Her eyes glanced over my shoulder. I knew she was looking at Rush. He was here and he was ignoring me in front of all these people. He was doing it for Nan’s sake but did that make it any better?

It slowly dawned on me. I’d become Bethy.

“I need the money so I can get my own place,” I told her with a forced smile. “Go mingle,” I encouraged her and walked off to the next group of people.

The eyes following me sent a burning sensation up my neck. I knew Rush was watching me. I didn’t have to turn and see him to confirm it. Had he just had the same realization that I had? I doubted it. He was a guy. I had become available and easy. I was also the world’s greatest hypocrite. I was now guilty of what I’d scolded and pitied Bethy for.

The last champagne flute left my tray and I walked back through the crowd careful not to go near Rush or Nan. I didn’t even glance their way. I had some pride left. I only had to stop three times for guests to put their empty flutes on my tray as I hurried back to the safety of the kitchen.

“Good you’re back. Take this tray. We need some food out there before they all drink too much and we have a high-faluting drunken mess on our hands,” Darla said, handing me a tray of things I didn’t recognize. They also smelled bad. I scrunched my nose and held the tray away from me. Darla cackled with laughter.

“It’s escargot, snails. They’re disgusting but these people think they are a delicacy. Get over the smell and go.” I felt my stomach roll. I could have done without that explanation. Escargot would have been a sufficient description.

When I reached the entrance to the ballroom I steadied myself and tried not to think about the snails I was giving people to eat or the fact that Rush was in there acting like he didn’t know me at all. After I’d spent the past two nights in his bed.

“You doing okay?” Woods asked when I walked inside the room. He was at my elbow looking concerned.

“Yes. Except for the fact I’m giving people snails to eat,” I replied. Woods chuckled, took one from my tray and popped it into his mouth.

“You should try one. They’re really very good. Especially soaked in garlic and butter.”

My stomach rolled again and I shook my head. Woods laughed out loud this time. “You always make things more interesting, Blaire,” he said, leaning down toward my ear. “I’m sorry about Rush. Just for the record, if you’d have chosen me you wouldn’t be working tonight. You’d be on my arm.”

I felt my face flush. It was enough to know I was a dirty little secret but for others to realize it was humiliating. I’d wanted Rush, though. So bad. Well, I’d got my wish alright.

“I need the money. I am very close to being able to afford a place of my own,” I informed him matter of factly.

Woods gave me a brisk nod and a sympathetic smile before turning to greet an elderly guest who was passing by. I took that moment to get away. I had snails to feed people.

Jimmy caught my eye and he winked at me reassuringly. He’d taken care of Rush’s side of the room brilliantly. I hadn’t even gotten close to him. Bethy smiled brightly at me when I arrived at her group. Her smile died when she looked at the food on my tray.

“What is that?” she asked in horror.

“You don’t want to know,” I informed her, causing Jace and a guy I wasn’t familiar with to laugh.

“Probably best that you let this pass on by,” Jace told Bethy as he tucked his hand around her waist and pulled her closer to his side affectionately.

She beamed up at him and that was all the sweet romance I could take. I hurried on to the next group. The curly red hair was familiar. It took me a second to place her. The evil venom in her smile reminded me exactly where I’d seen her before. She had been after Woods at Rush’s house the night of Nan’s party. I hadn’t made a fan that night thanks to Woods.

“Isn’t this fun?” she said, turning her attention away from the couple she’d been talking to and focusing on me. “Guess Woods decided you were more suited to work for him than date him.” She giggled and shook her head causing the red curls to bounce around. “I swear, this makes my night.” She reached up and tipped my tray.

Snails ran down the front of my shirt followed by the tray clattering loudly on the floor. I was too stunned to move or speak.

“Oh and look she’s super clumsy. Woods should be pickier about his employees,” the girl hissed hatefully.

“Ohmygod! Blaire, are you okay?” Bethy’s voice came from behind me snapping me out of my shock.

I managed to shake off the snails still clinging to my clothing.

“Move,” commanded a deep voice that I instantly recognized. My head shot up to find Rush pushing past the couple with the red head who seemed to be laughing at the mess I was in. He was angry. There was no mistaking that. Rush grabbed me by the waist and studied my face a moment. I wasn’t sure what for. “Are you okay?” he asked quietly.

I nodded, not sure how to react just yet.

The veins in his neck were once again straining against his skin as he swallowed hard. He barely turned his head to cut his eyes toward the red head. “Don’t come near me or her again. Understood?” he said in a deadly calm.

The girl’s eyes went wide. “What are you mad at me for? She’s the clumsy one. She dumped the whole tray all over herself.”

Rush’s hands clenched tightly on my hips. “If you utter one more word I’ll threaten to remove all my contributions from this club until you are escorted out. Permanently.”

The girl gasped, “But I’m Nan’s friend, Rush. Her oldest friend. You wouldn’t do that to me. Especially for the hired help.” The childish pout in her voice was odd coming from a twenty- one year old woman.

“Test me,” he replied.

He looked back down at me. “You’re coming with me.”

I didn’t have time to respond before he turned his head to look over my shoulder. “I have her Bethy. She’s okay. Go on back to Jace.” Rush slipped his hand around my waist. “Watch out for the snails; they’re slippery.”

Two of the busboys were hurrying into the room with supplies to clean up the mess. The music hadn’t stopped but the place had gone quiet. Slowly, people started to talk again. I kept my eyes on the door waiting until I could get outside of this ballroom and break away from Rush’s arms.

If everyone in there hadn’t known we were having sex, they did now. He’d just shown everyone that he cared about me to an extent but he didn’t exactly want to walk around with me on his arm. My chest ached. I needed my distance from him. It was time I learned to crawl back in my own little world where I trusted me and me only. No one else. Once we were out of the ballroom and away from prying eyes I stepped free of Rush and put some distance between us. I crossed my arms over my chest and stared down at my feet. I wasn’t sure if looking at him was such a good thing yet. I hadn’t taken time to enjoy how gorgeous he looked in a black tux. I’d been doing my best not to look at him. Now that he stood right here in front of me dressed like he was while I was in my server dress covered in snail oil, the massive difference between our worlds was evident.

“Blaire, I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting something like that to happen. I didn’t even know she had issues with you. I’m going to talk to Nan about this. I have a feeling she had something to do with it—“

“The redhead hates me because of Woods’ interest in me. Nan had nothing to do with it and neither did you.”

Rush didn’t respond right away. I wondered if I should just turn and walk back to the kitchen.

“Is Woods still hitting on you?”

Had he really just asked me that? I was standing there covered in snails and butter and he was asking me if some other guy was hitting on me? I didn’t even know if I still had a job. That was it. I’d had enough. I spun around and started for the kitchen. Rush didn’t let me get far. His hand shot out and grabbed my arm.

“Blaire, wait. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that. That isn’t the issue right now. I wanted to make sure you were okay and help get you cleaned up.” His voice was pained as he said the last part.

I sighed and turned back around and met his gaze this time. “I’m fine. I need to go to the kitchen and see if I even still have a job. I was warned by Woods this morning that something like this might happen and it would be my fault. So, right now I have bigger problems than you suddenly feeling the need to be possessive of me. Which is ridiculous. Because you were doing your best to ignore me until this incident happened. You either know me or you don’t, Rush. Pick a team.” The hurt in my voice hadn’t been easy to mask. I jerked my arm free of his hand and stalked back toward the kitchen.

“You were working. What did you want me to do?” he called out and I stopped. “Acknowledging you would have given Nan reason to attack you. I was protecting you.”

The fact he even admitted that told me so much. Nan came first. He was ignoring me to keep Nan happy. I’d expected this of course. I was just the booty call. Nan was the sister. He was right to choose her over me. How could he look at me as anything more when I’d gone so easily to his bed?

“You’re right, Rush. You ignoring me would keep Nan from attacking me. I’m just the girl you fucked the past two nights. All things considered I’m not that special. I’m one of many.” I didn’t wait for him to say anymore. I ran for the kitchen doors slamming into them before the tears welling up in my eyes broke free.

Chapter Twenty- Two

“Whoa, girl,” Jimmy said holding his arms out to catch me as I came barreling into the kitchen.

A hiccup escaped and I swallowed back the sob that followed it.

“That was brutal in there but it could have been worse. At least Rush came to the rescue.” Jimmy patted my back and hugged me.

I didn’t want Jimmy to know how incredibly cheap I was. I couldn’t tell him these tears were because I’d become a rich guys dirty little secret. Not because some mean bitch had dumped food all over me in front of a room full of people.

“Get back out there Jim. We need more servers on the floor. I’ll talk to Blaire,” Woods said as he walked into the kitchen.

Jimmy hugged me hard one more time then frowned over at Woods before taking his tray and heading for the door. “You be nice to my girl,” Jimmy said as he passed Woods.

Woods didn’t reply. Instead he studied me. I figured this was it. The big “it’s your fault so you can leave now” moment.

“I go to the trouble of warning you about Nan and it isn’t even Rush’s fault a jealous bitch attacked you,” Woods growled and shook his head in disgust. “I’m sorry, Blaire. This one is all on me. I wasn’t expecting that from her. She’s the crazy exgirlfriend I can’t seem to shake.”

He wasn’t firing me? I leaned back on the counter behind me to take a deep breath.

“Due to the drama, I don’t want you back out there. You can stay in here and help prepare trays though. I’ll make sure you make the same amount as you would have made out there.”

“Thank you. But can I change?” I asked, needing to get the snail off of me.

Woods smiled, “Yeah. Go get one of the cart girl outfits from the office. We have all our extra server uniforms in use tonight.”

I pushed off from the counter and headed for the door.

“Take your time. We are fine in here if you need a break,” Woods called out as I exited the kitchen.

Rush and Nan stood in the hallway in what looked like a heated argument when I walked out. Nan shot her icy glare my way. I could see the frustration in Rush’s expression. I was only causing him grief. I didn’t care to see this. They could have their family quarrel and get over it. After tonight, I should have enough money to move out. Tomorrow I would find a place because sleeping under Rush’s roof was going to be impossible. I turned and opened the door leading outside.

“Blaire, wait,” Rush called out.

“Let her go, Rush,” Nan demanded.

“I can’t,” he replied.

The door closed behind me and I tried to block out what I’d heard. I didn’t need to think or even consider that Rush would fight for me.

The door swung open and Rush came running out of it. “Blaire, please wait. Talk to me,” he begged.

I stopped and watched as he ran over to stand in front of me. I had nothing to say to him. I’d said it all.

“I’m sorry. But you’re wrong; I didn’t ignore you in there. Go ask anyone. My eyes never left you. If there was any question in anyone’s mind how I felt about you, the fact I couldn’t look away from you while you walked around that room should have answered it.” He paused and ran his hand over his hair, and muttered a curse. “Then I saw the look on your face when you saw Bethy with Jace. Something inside me was ripped open. I didn’t know what you were thinking but I knew you were realizing the wrongness of tonight. You should have never been there serving everyone. You should have been by my side. I wanted you beside me. I was strung so damn tight waiting on anyone to make a wrong move toward you that I forgot to breathe most of the time.”

Rush reached out and ran a finger over my clenched fist. “If you can forgive me, I promise this will never happen again. I love Nan. But I’m done trying to please her. She’s my sister and she has some issues she needs to work out. I’ve told her that I’m going to talk to you about everything. There are some things you need to know.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m dealing with the fact that you may walk away from me once you know them and never look back. It scares the hell out of me. I don’t know what this is that is going on between us but from the moment I laid eyes on you I knew you were going to change my world. I was terrified. The more I watched you the more you drew me in. I couldn’t get close enough.”

He was ready to open up to me and let me in. He wasn’t just using me. I wasn’t just another girl he screwed and tossed aside. He was ready to let me into his world of secrets. He wanted to keep me. My heart gave up. I’d held back and I’d fought hard to keep him from taking it over. Still, he’d managed to own it. Seeing him vulnerable was the last straw. I couldn’t hold back anymore.

I had fallen too far. I was in love with Rush Finlay.

“Okay,” I said. There was nothing more to say. He had me.

Rush frowned. “Okay?”

I nodded. “Okay. If you actually want to keep me so badly that you’re willing to open up to me, then okay.” I would not tell him I loved him. It was too soon. He’d think it was because I was so young. That was something I’d hold close to my chest until I knew it was time. Maybe it was because I was so young. I felt it just the same.

A small grin tugged on his lips. “I just bared my soul to you and all I get is an ‘okay’?” he asked.

I shrugged, “You said everything I needed to hear. I’m hooked now. You have me. What are you going to do with me?”

Rush let out a low sexy laugh and pulled me close to him. “I’m thinking sex on the sixteenth hole by the lake would be nice.”

I tilted my head as if I were thinking about it. “Hmmm… problem is I’m supposed to change and go work in the kitchen the rest of the night.”

Rush let out a heavy sigh. “Shit.”

I pressed a kiss to his jawline. “You have a sister to escort,” I reminded him.

Rush’s arms tightened around me. “All I can think about is being inside you. Having you pressed close to me and hearing you make those sexy ass little moans.”

Oh. My. My heart rate picked up at the thought.

“If I could walk away from you easily I’d take you into that office and press you up against the wall and burry myself deep inside. But I can’t have a quickie with you. You’re too damn addictive.”

His description had me breathing hard and clinging to his shoulders. “Go change. I’ll stand out here so I’m not tempted. Then I’ll walk you back to the kitchen,” Rush said as he slowly released me.

I needed a moment to get myself under control before I let go of his arms. Then I turned and hurried into the office.

I didn’t see Rush again after he left me at the kitchen door with a quick kiss. The night had been endless and I was exhausted. Preparing food was harder than it looked. After the place had emptied and cleared out we had then been left with the task of cleaning up.

Three hours later it was almost four in the morning. I all but stumbled out into the early morning darkness and headed for my truck. Part of me expected Rush to be waiting on me but then he’d have had to sleep in his car so that would have been ridiculous.

I cranked up my truck and headed for his house. I didn’t have to go into work today so I could sleep. I also wouldn’t need to find that apartment any longer. As soon as I pulled into the driveway I looked up to see the lights were still on in Rush’s room. The top of the house was all lit up compared to the darkness in the rest of it.

The front door was unlocked so I went inside and quietly closed the door behind me. I wondered if Rush was still awake waiting on me or if he’d just fallen asleep with the lights on? Did I go to my room or his?

I headed up the stairs and found Rush sitting on the floor leaning against his door looking directly at me. What was he doing?

When his eyes met mine he stood up and stalked toward me. I met him half way. He seemed desperate. I just couldn’t figure out why. “I need you upstairs. Now,” he said in a tight frantic voice.

My heart sped up. Was someone hurt? Was he okay?

I hurried behind him. He closed the door and locked it. He never locked it. Then his hands were on me before we’d even made it up the stairs.

It was as if some wild man had taken over. Rush ran his hands down my hips and over my behind then back up. He grabbed my shirt and ripped it off. I heard a button pop and winced. That was a uniform shirt. I started to ask him what was wrong but his mouth covered mine and his tongue was inside. His hands found the snap on my shorts and jerking them open he began to push them down. The hungry little growls he was making were causing my body to react. I felt the wetness between my legs and the anxious throb start up.

Rush pushed me back on the stairs and jerked off my shoes and pulled my shorts and panties off then grabbed both my knees and pushed them apart. I didn’t have time to process before his mouth was on me licking the folds and slipping inside of me. My still tender flesh from the wild sex we’d had last night was extremely sensitive to each caress of his tongue. I began crying out his name. Falling back on my elbows I watched as he rained kisses along my thighs and then buried his face between my legs again to send me panting and begging for more.

“Mine. This is mine,” he chanted like a man possessed as he pulled back to look down at me. He ran his fingers through the middle gently and then cut his eyes up at me, “Mine. This sweet pussy is mine, Blaire.”

I was ready to agree to anything if he’d make me come. I wanted him inside me first though.

“Tell me it’s mine,” he demanded.

I nodded and he slipped a finger up inside causing another moan to escape me. “Tell me it is mine,” he repeated.

“It’s yours, now please Rush, fuck me.”

His eyes went wide and he stood up and pushed down the pajama bottoms he was wearing. His erection stood out proudly.

“No condom tonight. I’ll pull out. I just need to feel all of you,” he said as he pushed my knees up and lowered himself down until he was at my entrance. He didn’t slam into me like I expected. He eased in slow.

“Does it hurt?” he asked as he held himself over me.

It did a little but I wasn’t going to admit to that. I wanted him without control. “It feels good,” I assured him.

He bit his bottom lip and eased slowly back out. “These stairs are too hard for you. Come here.” He bent down and scooped me up in his arms and started up the steps. I’d never been carried by a guy before and I have to say this was an excellent experience. Rush’s naked chest holding me was incredible.

“Will you do something for me?” he asked bending his head down to press small kisses to my nose and eyelids.

“Yes,” I replied.

He stopped by the bed and slowly put me down until my feet touched the floor. “Bend over and lay your chest flat on the bed. Put your hands over your head and leave your ass stuck up in the air.”

Um… okay. I didn’t ask why because I had figured that much out. Keeping my feet on the floor, I bent forward and laid on the bed like he asked.

His hand ran over my bottom and he made a pleased sound in his throat. “You have the most perfect ass I’ve ever seen,” he said in a worshipful tone.

Both of his hands found my hips and slowly he entered me pulling me back onto him as he slid inside. He was deeper this way. “Rush!” I cried out as the slight pain hit from the depth he’d reached.

“Fuck, I’m deep,” he groaned.

Then he pulled out slowly and his hips began that familiar rocking. I grabbed onto the sheets as my body began to climb toward its climax. It knew what was coming and my legs started to tremble from the pleasure starting to build inside me.

One of Rush’s hands slipped down until it was touching my swollen clit and he began rubbing his thumb over it. “God, you’re soaking wet,” he panted.

My legs stiffened as the orgasm washed over me and then I began to buck unable to deal with the sensation of Rush still rubbing me. It was so much pleasure that it hurt. Before I could beg for mercy, his hands grabbed my waist and he pulled out of me quickly.

“GAAAAH!” he yelled as I collapsed onto the bed knowing without looking that he’d pulled out before he came.

“Damn baby, if you only knew how fucking incredible your ass looks right now,” he said in a breathless voice.

I turned my head to the side unable to lift it and looked at him. “Why?”

A low chuckle rumbled from his chest. “Let’s just say I need to clean you up.”

Realization dawned on me and the warmth on my bottom that I hadn’t noticed before suddenly caught my attention. A giggle broke free and I buried my face in my hands.

I laid there listening as he ran the water and then walked back out to me. The warmth of the washcloth as he wiped me clean of his cum was nice and I slowly started to fall asleep. I was exhausted. I wondered if I’d ever wake up.

Chapter Twenty- Three

I was alone. I covered my eyes against the morning sun and looked around the room. Rush wasn’t up here. That was surprising. I sat up and looked at the clock. It was after ten. No wonder he wasn’t up here. I’d slept the morning away. Today we would talk. He was going to let me in. Last night we’d had amazing sex. I needed words now.

I stood up and found my discarded shorts lying on the end of the bed. Rush must have brought them upstairs because I remembered leaving them on the stairs last night. I slipped them on and then looked around for my shirt. One of Rush’s tee shirts was folded neatly beside my shorts so I slipped it on and headed downstairs. I was ready to see Rush.

The doors on the family side of the hall were open. I froze. What did that mean? They were always closed. Then I heard voices. I walked toward the second flight of stairs and listened. My father’s familiar voice carried up the stairs from the living room. He was home.

I took the first step and stopped. Could I face him? Would he ask me to leave? Would he know I’d slept with Rush? Would Nan have her mother hate me too? I hadn’t had time to work through all of this yet.

My father said my name and I knew I needed to go down there and face this. Whatever it might be. I forced myself down each step. I made it across the foyer and stopped once I could hear them clearly. I needed to know what I was walking into.

“I can’t believe you, Rush. What were you thinking? You know who she is? What she means to this family?” It was his mother talking. I’d never met her but I knew.

“You can’t hold her responsible. She wasn’t even born yet. You have no idea what all she’s been through. What HE has put her through.” Rush was angry.

I started to walk to the door but paused. Wait. What I meant to this family? What was she talking about?

“Don’t go getting all high and mighty. You were the one who went and found him for me. So whatever he put her through,” she spat, “you started it all. Then you go and sleep with her? Really Rush. My God what were you thinking? You’re just like your father.”

I reached out to grab the doorframe for support. I didn’t know what was coming but my breathing was becoming shallow. I could feel panic rising in my chest.

“Remember who owns this house, mother,” Rush’s warning was clear.

His mother let out a loud cackle. “Can you believe this? He is turning on me over a girl he just met. Abe you have to do something.”

There was silence. Then my father cleared his throat. “It’s his house, Georgie. I can’t force him to do anything. I should have expected this. She’s so much like her mother.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” the woman roared.

My father sighed, “We’ve been over this before. The reason I left you for her was because she had this draw to her. I couldn’t seem to let her go—“

“I KNOW that. I don’t want to hear it again. You wanted her so damn badly you left me pregnant with a bunch of wedding invitations to rescind.”

“Sweetheart, calm down. I love you. I was just explaining that Blaire has her mother’s charisma. It’s impossible not to be drawn to her. And she’s just as blind to it as her mother was. She can’t help it.”

“ARGH! Will that woman never leave me alone? Will she always ruin my life? She’s gone for crying out loud. I have the man I love back and our daughter finally has her father and now this. You go and sleep with this, this girl!”

My body was numb. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t take deep breaths. I was still dreaming. That was it. I hadn’t woken up yet. I closed my eyes tightly forcing myself to wake up from this sick and twisted dream.

“One more word against her and I will have you leave.” Rush’s tone was cold and hard.

“Georgie, honey, please calm down. Blaire is a good girl. Her being here isn’t the end of the world. She needs somewhere to stay. I explained this to you already. I know you hate Rebecca but she was your best friend. The two of you had been friends since you were kids. Until I came along and ruined everything the two of you were like sisters. This is her daughter. Have some compassion.”

No. NO. No. No. No. I did not just hear that. This is not real. My mother would never have broken up someone’s wedding. She would have never had my dad leave a woman who was pregnant with his child. My mother was a sweet compassionate woman. She would never, ever let that happen. I couldn’t stand here and listen to them talk about her that way. They had it all wrong. They didn’t know her. My father had been gone so long he’d forgotten what really happened.

I let go of the death grip I had on the door frame and stalked into the room where they were disgracing my mother’s name. “NO! Shut up all of you,” I yelled. The room went silent. I found my father and leveled my angry glare on him. No one else in here mattered right now. Not the woman who continued to spit lies about my mother or the man I thought I loved. The one I’d given my body to. The one who had been lying to me.

“Blaire,” Rush’s voice sounded far away. I held out my hand to stop him. I didn’t want him near me.

“You,” I pointed my finger at my father. “You are just letting them lie about my mother,” I screamed. I didn’t care if I looked crazy. I hated them all right now.

“Blaire let me explain—“

“SHUT UP!” I roared. “My sister, my other half, died. She died, Dad. In a car on her way to the store with YOU. It was like my soul had been taken from me and torn in two. Losing her was unbearable. I watched my mother wail and cry and mourn and then I watched my father walk away. Never to return. While his daughter and wife were trying to pick up the pieces of their world without Valerie in it. Then my mother gets sick. I call you but you don’t answer. So, I get an extra job after school and I start making payments for mom’s medical care. I do nothing but care for my mother and go to school. Except my senior year, she gets so sick that I have to drop out. Take my GED and be done with it. Because I had the only person on the planet who loved me dying as I sat and watched helplessly. I held her hand while she took her last breath. I arranged her funeral. I watched them lower her into the ground. You never once called. Not once. Then I had to sell the house Gran left us and everything of value in it just to pay off medical bills.” I stopped and took a loud heaving breath and a sob escaped me.

Two arms wrapped around me and I screamed, slinging my arms and moving away. “DON’T TOUCH ME!” I didn’t want him touching me. He had lied to me. He knew this and he had lied to me.

“Now I’m being forced to hear you talk about my mother who was a saint. Do you hear me? She was a saint! You are all liars. If anyone is guilty of this bullshit I hear pouring out of your mouth it is that man.” I pointed at my father. I couldn’t call him that anymore. Not now.

“He is the liar. He isn’t worth the dirt beneath my feet. If Nan is his daughter. If you were pregnant.” I swung my eyes to the woman I had yet to look at and the words froze on my lips. I remembered her. I staggered back and shook my head. No. This was not what it looked like.

“Who are you?” I asked as the memories of that face slowly came back to me.

“Careful how you answer that,” Rush’s tight voice came from behind me. He was still close to me.

Her eyes shifted from me to my father then back to me. “You know who I am Blaire. We’ve met before.”

“You came to my house. You… you made my mother cry.”

The woman rolled her eyes.

“Last warning, mother,” Rush said.

“Nan wanted to meet her father. So I brought her to him. She got to see his nice little family with pretty, blonde twin daughters he loved and an equally perfect wife. I was tired of having to tell my daughter she didn’t have a father. She knew she did. So I showed her just what he had chosen instead of her. She didn’t ask about him again until much later in life.”

The little girl my age that had stood holding her mother’s hand tightly and studying me as I stood at the door. It had been Nan. My stomach rolled. What had my father done?

“Blaire please look at me.” Rush’s desperate voice came from behind me but I couldn’t acknowledge him. He knew all this. This had been Nan’s big secret. He had protected it for her. Did he not see this was my secret too? He was my father and I knew nothing. Woods’ words rang in my head. “If he has to choose between you and Nan he will choose Nan.”

He knew then that Rush had chosen Nan. Everyone in this town knew the secret but me. They all knew who I was but I didn’t.

“I was engaged to Georgianna. She was pregnant with Nan. Your mother came to visit her. She was like no one I’d ever met. She was addictive. I couldn’t seem to stay away from her. Georgianna was still pinning over Dean and Rush was still visiting his dad every other weekend. I expected Georgie to go to Dean the minute he decided he wanted a family. I wasn’t even sure Nan was mine. Your mother was innocent and fun. She wasn’t into rockers and she made me laugh. I pursued her and she ignored me. Then I lied to her. I told her Georgie was pregnant with another of Dean’s kids. She felt sorry for me. I somehow convinced her to run away with me. To throw away the friendship she’d had all her life.”

I pressed my hands over my ears to block out my dad’s words. I couldn’t listen to this. It was all lies. This sick world they lived in wasn’t for me. I wanted to go home. Back to Alabama. Back to what I understood. Where money and rock stars weren’t an issue.

“Stop. I don’t want to hear it. I just want my things. I just want to leave.” The sob that followed couldn’t be helped. My world and what I’d known of it had just been blown to a million pieces. I needed to go sit by my mother’s grave and talk to her. I wanted to go home.

“Baby, please talk to me. Please.” Rush was behind me again. I was too tired to push him away. I moved away from him instead. I would not look at him. “I can’t look at you. I don’t want to talk to you. I just want my things. I want to go home.”

“Blaire, honey, there is no home.” My dad’s voice grated on my nerves. I lifted my eyes and glared at him. All the pain and bitterness I’d kept from creeping in when he left us had consumed me.

“My mother and my sister’s graves are home. I want to be near them. I’ve stood here and listened to y’all tell me my mother was someone who I know she wasn’t. She would have never done what you’re accusing her of. Stay here with your family, Abe. I’m sure they will love you as much as your last one did. Try not to kill any of them,” I spat.

Georgianna’s loud gasp was the last thing I heard before I left the room. I wanted to leave but I needed my purse and my keys. I ran up the stairs and threw everythin

Date: 2015-12-18; view: 483