DO'S AND DON'TS WITH FILIPINOS

Here are some general statements intended to help Masters and officers sailing with Fihpino seamen:

1. Do understand the Filipino's body language:

The Filipino frequently nods in the middle of a conversation, which simply means, "I understand what you are saying," but it does not mean "yes."

The eyebrows are raised in recognition, and to answer "yes."

Establishing eye contact is a recognition signal. A smile to go with it becomes a friendly "hello" without words.

The lips are used to point

"Sst-Sst" is used to get attention.

Clucking (like giggling) is used to show sympathy.

The common signal for OK where the thumb and index finger form a circle means for Filipinos money. The new sign for OK is the thumb-up sign.

Using one's forefinger or index finger upward to call a Filipino is considered degrading and only used for animals. A downward gesture of the hand should be used without making the arch too wide since this will appear too dominating.

Staring is rude and aggressive. The better part of valor when confronted by a glaring tough looking character is to look briefly and then cast one's gaze away.

Arms akimbo is considered arrogant, challenging, angry. It is not a posture that will win and influence Filipinos, unless you are a policeman about to issue a traffic ticket.

It is insulting to beckon someone by crooking your finger. Filipinos will point out a direction by shifting their eyes towards the direction indicated.

A light touch on the elbow is permissible when calling someone's attention.

Two males holding hands or with arms over each other's shoulders are the acepted norm, free of any overtones of homosexuality.

Physical contact with opposite sex in public is not on. Ladies greet each other with a kiss on the cheek, but male and female keep respectfully apart. Some women may shake hands with a man, but they have to initiate such gesture.

A limp handshake is socially acceptable.

A woman and a man will refrain from being demonstrative in public.

The average Filipino requires less privacy than the average Westerner. He tends to require less personal space as well. Filipinos stand close to one another when walking and talking, - and do not find body contact in crowds offensive.

Filipinos usually don't queue or line up.

2. Do understand the Filipino's physical and verbal mannerisms:

Officers, elders and superiors are addressed by "sir" or " ma'am", or by their title or profession.

When asking a question, an apology is offered first (I'm sorry to bother you, but...)

When inviting a Filipino, do invite him at least three times. Filipinos are taught that it is proper to refuse the first time or two. To them, insistence is a clear sign that the offer or invitation is a sincere one.

Flowers are associated with death. Give food to a sick Filipino, but not flowers.

"Pasalubong" is a gift given as a souvenir after a trip. A superior bringing "pasalubong" when returning from a trip shows to his people that he thought of them during his absence.

Consistency is a prime requisite for a smooth relationship for Filipinos.

The use of a third party or intermediary is a very acceptable norm for asking and for telling. This helps avoid a direct confrontation situation, which may lead to embarrassment.

3. Do understand what annoy Filipinos:

Someone who strongly disagrees with his opinion in a discus­sion. You can disagree with him but not strongly.

A person who looks down on him.

Ignorance that foreigners show about his native land.

Minute attention to small details.

A person who treats him like a servant.

Criticism from someone who is not his superior.

Someone with less experience telling him how to do his job.

Inconsideration for his feelings.

Race prejudice.

Body odor.

A foreigner who says "that is the way we do it back home."

Being told to hurry up.

An air of superiority in a person.

A blunt and overly frank person.

Rich people who refuse to talk to people of lower social status.

Foreigners who write about his native land without knowing too much about it.

People who preach democracy but do not practice it.

People who demand a yes or no answer.

People who take credit for what is accomplished in joint efforts.

4. Do understand the Filipino concept of property.

The Filipino concept of property is threefold:

1) What is mine is mine. The Filipinoshave inherited from the Western world the concept of private ownership such as having land titles and documents for things they own.

2) What is yours is mine. The kapitbahay or ncighborliness value requires a Filipino to share some ofhis'properties with his neighbor; vice-versa, this value gives him right to some properties of his neighbors. In the name of neighborliness, a neighbor can borrow another's car or go and watch TV in another's house.

3) What is public property is mine. The Filipino value of sakop makes public and private properties assume a communal dimension. In the Philippines public property belongs to no one. Rather the user of public property appears to regard it as his own personal property.

The Filipino uses public space while driving as he would while walking - taking on rights to it as he moves. He considers that particular spot on which he stands or which he moves, his personal property and, therefore, utilizes it as long as neces­sary in any way he wants.

The Filipino when elected or appointed to office, tend to use his office, vehicle, telephone, for his private and personal use.

The sharing of goods in the sakop dimension might actually be "borrowing." The Filipinos, for example, who have a strong sense of sakop property, consider things "borrowed" what Westerners consider "stealing."

5. Do call a Filipino by his name. A Filipino subordinate called by his officer by his name feels very elated because he is proud to know that his superior knows him personally.

6. Always offer a Filipino coffee, tea or something when he visits you. This is a sign that he is welcome to your office.

7. It would always be proper to say "Quiet please" or "kindly tone down" rather than saying "Shut up."

8 Do give a Filipino a way out of a situation so he can save his face and not get embarassed. Such embarassment causes "hiya" which is painful for a Filipino to accept.

9 Don't lend money except in very exceptional cases. Repayment may be a problem. To avoid misunderstanding as to whether it is really borrowing or not, make a clear distinction between the three concepts of property of the Filipino. In some cases borrowing money may just be a symbolic way of asking for money.

10 Don't expect punctuality or promptness in terms of time if you have not clamfied whether it is linear or cyclical time that applies to the situation.

[1] From a speech delivered by Dr. Angelina Ramirez

Date: 2015-12-11; view: 523