In-Laws Demand Helping Hand

Dear Ann Landers,

Most of the letters that appear in your column come from city people. Please print a problem that might be boring to your urban readers, but farm folks need help too. My husband and I have been married fifteen years. We have five children and we get along fine. The only thorn in my side is my in-laws. They have the farm next to ours and we end up doing all their hard work.

Every morning for fifteen years my father-in-law has telephoned my husband before breakfast, or worse, has come over here in person and told my husband what to do, as if he were a small child. If we are at the breakfast table, my father-in-law pulls up a chair and tells him to hurry up.

When my in-laws go on vacations, we are expected to do the chores. They cannot do our chores when we go on vacation because they can barely handle their own. So, when we leave town, we have to hire help. I feel they should do the same.

My husband has two brothers but they were a lot smarter than he was. They went to college and got away from their parents. It burns me up to listen to them and their wives tell us how comforting it is to know that the folks have somebody near to help them, now that they are getting on in years.

We can't move so please don't suggest it, Ann. Just tell me if there is any way to get a grown man to cut himself loose from his parents so he and his family can lead their own lives.

Dakota Plight

Vocabulary

urban

a thorn in my side

to end up

to get burned up

to get on in years

a plight

Factual Questions

1. Where does the writer of this letter live?

2. Are the writer and her husband happily married?

3. What is the thorn in her side?

4. What happens when her in-laws go on vacation?

5. What happens when her family goes on vacation?

6. Why does she resent her husband's brothers?

7. What question does the woman ask?

8. In what state does she live?

Discussion

1. Why do you suppose the two farms are next to each other?

2. Do you think the two brothers are younger than the writer's husband? Would this explain why he must give more help to his parents than his brothers do?

3. Does the statement "they were a lot smarter … they went to college …" mean that her husband was less intelligent that his brothers and therefore was not admitted to a college?

4. How do you think the husband feels about the situation?

5. Do you think the husband would agree with the question which his wife asks at the end of her letter? Is there any indication in the letter that he is unhappy with the present arrangement?

Writing

Write a letter to Dakota Plight, as if you were Ann Landers, and give your opinion about the situation.

Vocabulary

insoluble

to be tried up

to compromise

hostility

From the desk ofAnn Landers

Discussion

1. Can you think of any other suggestions?

2. How come Ann Landers realizes that it's impossible for the husband to break himself away from his parents but his wife doesn't?

SITUATION 10.

An Uninvited Guest

Dear Ann Landers,

What should a person do if he is dining in the home of a friend and he comes upon a foreign substance in the food like, shall we say, a hairpin in the soufflé? This happened to me recently and I said nothing, but it could have been a serious thing. Yesterday I had a similar experience, only it was a worm in a fresh peach which had been sliced and served over ice cream. I was speaking to the hostess when I noticed it. I kept my wits about me, continued to talk, and ate around the worm.

If such a thing happens again, what should be done? Do you feel the hostess would want to know?

Lost My Appetite

Factual questions

1. What recently happened to this letter writer?

2. What was the similar experience yesterday?

3. What did the writer do about it?

4. What is the question that the writer asks?

Discussion

1. Is the writer a man or a woman? What evidence do you have for your answer?

2. Have you ever had this kind of experience? If so, describe the circumstances and what you did.

3. If you were the host or hostess, would you expect or want your guests to tell you if anything is wrong with the food that you serve?

4. Would you act differently if this happened in a restaurant? Why?

5. What would you do in a similar situation if you didn't like the food your hostess had prepared?

Writing

Write a letter, as if you were Ann Landers, that answers the question asked by Lost My Appetite.

Language in life

Suppose you decide that the answer to the question in the last sentence is: Yes, the hostess would want to know. You might say, "Excuse me, there seems to be a worm in my peach." Suggest other polite ways to tell your hostess this embarrassing information.

Suppose this happens in a very expensive restaurant and you are extremely upset. Demand that the management pay for your meal, which has been ruined.

Vocabulary

to come upon

a foreign substance

shall we say

a soufflé

a worm

to slice

a hostess

kept my wits about me

appetite

From the desk ofAnn Landers

Discussion

1. Do you agree or disagree with Ann Landers' advice?

2. Do you think that the answer to the question, "Do you feel the hostess would want to know?", depends on how well the hostess and guest know each other?

3. If the guest eats around the worm, he or she presumably would leave the worm on the plate. In this case, the hostess is likely to see the worm later. Then how do you suppose she will feel?

SITUATION 11.

Lover’s Language Worries Lover

Dear Ann Landers,

I have been dating a young man for several years. Dan is everything a girl could want. Well, almost. He is kind, nice looking, considerate, fun to be with, and he makes good money. The only drawback is his grammer. For example, he says "I seen," "youse," "have went," and "between you and I".

I bite my tongue when he makes these awful mistakes, especially in the presence of my friends. I don't want to be ashamed of him, Ann, and I don't want to embarrass him either, but I'm afraid one day I might.

Is there a chance that we can have a good marriage in spite of this? I am 26 and a college graduate. Dan is 27 and attended a trade school. I do love him, but I fear I'll be a nagging wife – or worse yet, a silent wife who is ashamed of her husband's grammer.

Please hurry your answer. He is waiting for mine.

York, Pennsylvania

Factual questions

1. How long have she and Dan been dating?

2. Why does she like Dan?

3. What is the drawback?

4. What doesn't she want to do?

5. What is she afraid of?

6. What question does she ask Ann Landers?

Vocabulary

considerate

a drawback

to bite one's tongue

to be ashamed

to embarrass

a trade school

to nag

in spite of

Language use

Note the last line of the letter. Mine is a possessive pronoun. In this case, what does it take the place of?

Discussion

1. Have you ever been embarrassed by someone's bad grammar? Are there mistakes in your own language similar to the kinds that upset this girl? Are some kinds of mistakes in your language considered to be more serious than other kinds of mistakes?

2. Do you think that speaking or writing your own language incorrectly can be a drawback in work or business, in social situations, or in a marriage? Explain.

3. How, or by whom, is correctness in your language decided? Do you believe that anything a native speaker says is acceptable, even if it doesn't follow the traditional rules?

4. When you make a mistake while speaking English in class, how do you feel about your teacher correcting you? Would you rather be corrected (1) immediately, (2) after you have finished what you wanted to say, or (3) alone in private? Why?

5. When you're talking with an English-speaking friend, how do you feel about being corrected if you make a mistake?

6. The writer of this letter is a college graduate. The man she wants to marry is not. Do you think this difference in education makes a difference in the success of a marriage? If only one person of a married couple can be college educated, does it matter if it's the husband or the wife? Why? What difference does it make?

Writing

Now write a reply to York's letter, as if you were Ann Landers.

From the desk ofAnn Landers

Discussion

1. Do you agree with Ann Landers that Dan is too good to discard? Why or why not? If Dan and York get married, what kind of relationship do you think they will have?

2. What if Dan tells York he doesn't want to be corrected, that he thinks his English is fine? What should she do? What would you do?

3. What things/qualities are most important to a successful marriage, in your opinion? What kind of man or woman is your ideal mate? How would he or she talk, behave, dress, feel, think?

SITUATION 12.

Date: 2015-12-11; view: 770