Note from the Author 14 page

Dominic tilted his dark imperious head and gave her a perverse smile. “I haven’t been okay for a very long time, Eden,” he said grimly. He wanted a drink, something strong that would lessen the constriction in his chest and allay the feeling of helplessness that he had not been able to shake since telling her of his past. He wanted to run back into that darkness that had consequently become his prison, friend, and master.

“I’m sorry for what you went through,” she said quietly, her voice a caress of compassion that felt so good and so bad in the same breath.

His mouth compressed into a hard line and his darkly handsome features tightened considerably, drawing his brow into a menacing frown. He could only imagine what he looked like. If his appearance was anything like the turmoil raging in him, then Dominic could only surmise that he looked every bit the monster she called him. “It’s fine,” he bit out, harsher than intended.

“No,” she knelt at his side; the tentative touch of her hand on his knee had Dominic looking down into her luminous citrine eyes that were beguiling. “It’s not fine. What your mother did to you was not okay, Dominic. It was cruel and evil and you have to know you didn’t deserve that sort of abuse. No child does,” she whispered emphatically, as if she understood his pain.

“I haven’t gone back there until tonight and a part of me hates that I brought you there,” he confided without rancor. “I should not have said anything to you.”

“Then why did you?”

“Because I break my own rules when it comes to you,” he returned pointedly. “Those memories were mine, and if had any pride, I would not have shared them with you.”

“Your pride hasn’t done us any good so far,” she said with a soft sigh. “You cling so tightly to something so ugly when it’s only hurting you. It’s a burden you weren’t meant to carry.”

“It is nevertheless my burden. My entire childhood was filled with nothing but ugliness. That is all I’ve known. It is who I am.”

“You are not your mother’s mistakes, Dominic,” Eden imparted gently. “I keep thinking about Liam and try to imagine—”

“No!” he spelled out with unequivocal authority. “He will never know such a life. You have given more to my son in the five months since he’s been born than that woman ever gave me in the eight years I spent with her.” His mouth twisted bitterly in recollection.

“Did you love her?”

He gave a sharp laugh. “I abandoned what little love I had left for her the moment she sold me. I abandoned a lot of things in that apartment.”

“Yourself included.”

His large hand cupped the side of her face with a tenderness that surprised them both, and while he waited with bated breath to see if she would pull away, she remained as she was and simply looked back at him expectantly. “I’ve hurt you,” he conceded. “Tell me how to fix it.”

Eden licked her lips. “Apologize.”

He leaned forward until his breath was her own and said with every bit of sincerity and fervor that lay in him, “There are no words that can convey how sorry I am for what I put you through, Eden. What I did to you is unforgivable. I make no excuses for my actions except to tell you that they were done in fear and weakness. I have made so many mistakes in the last five years in regards to this marriage, but there is nothing I regret more than failing you as a husband.”

Eden’s eyes drifted close as she leaned into his hand and savored this moment. His apology, long awaited, was a balm to a damaged heart, a small but significant step towards mending this chaotically complex relationship. “We didn’t enter this marriage with the best intentions,” she admitted, opening her eyes to find his smoldering gaze intent on her mouth, while his thumb slid languidly across her full bottom lip.

“No, I never did have the best intentions when it came to you,” he said huskily, and just before he claimed her mouth, he uttered the words that sent a current of blazing desire through her bloodstream, “but being in your Eden has made it well worth it.”

He kissed her slow and deep, like mating, it was decadent and carnal. His lips sucked on hers, alternating from top to bottom with every sweet, warm breath they shared. His tongue circled languidly, stroking along hers and took it deeper. He kindled the flames of Eden’s inferno, roused it with this erotic play of tongue, lips and nipping teeth until liquid fire pooled luxuriantly between her thighs. The sensitive tips of her nipples swelled and chafed uncomfortably against her top every time she moved, making her utterly aware of her hunger for him.

She rose to her knees, reached out, and felt the stubble of his jaw beneath the tips of her caressing fingers, and feeling emboldened, drugged possibly by the potency of his kiss, she slid the tip of her tongue along the barely discernible scar at the corner of his top lip. That one move elicited a deep, masculine groan as he buried his hands in her hair and brusquely hauled her to his lap, deftly positioning her so that his thick straining cock aligned snuggly against the thin layer of her panties. “No good intentions here, Eden,” he purred hotly against her ear, bracing a hand at the nape of her neck to hold her steady while the other crept down her back in possessive caress that shot a ribbon of desire along her ramrod spine, leaving goose bumps in its wake. “Tell me to stop.” His urgency came out as a growl as he brushed his lips along the side of her face, his tongue darting out to lick at the racing pulse of her neck.

She was treading on dangerous ground and knew she should stop him. But the truth was that Eden did not want him to. She was tired of fighting this constant battle. Tired of denying herself that one thing she intrinsically knew she wanted. He was the only one who could temper the frantic desire that pulsed inside her. Tossing all conscious thought out the window, she submitted to baser instinct. “Don’t stop.” She barely recognized the breathless, needy sound as her own voice. When her mouth touched his in soft invitation, he accepted it without hesitation, plunging his tongue between her pliant lips to take the sweetness that he craved.

He brushed at the thin, measly straps of her camisole and it slid down the curve of her shoulders, pooling like nothing between them. Her nipples puckered at the weight of his voracious gaze, and color grazed her cheeks as he bent his dark head down, his mouth covering a dusky tip, the gentle suckle sending delicious tremors through her body. She leaned back, needing more of him, more of his talented tongue, Eden wantonly offered herself, rocking steadily all the while against the thick, rock hard shaft beneath her damp panties. The motion had him cursing, a violent word against her skin as he bucked beneath her, needing inside of her. In the subsequent seconds, Eden heard the distinct sound of her panties tearing and then there was the maneuvering of his large hand between them before freeing himself from the confines of his trousers. Eden captured her bottom lip between her teeth as she stared fixedly at it, her feminine walls clenching in anticipation. “Last chance,” he murmured raggedly against her cheek, his hands all the while kneading the delectable globes of her buttocks. She replied simply by bracing her hands on his shoulders, positioning herself at the bulbous tip of his beautiful cock before slowly impaling herself with it, taking every velveteen steeled inch until nothing but skin separated their closeness.

Dominic expelled a breath, sure that he would burst if he didn’t calm the hell down. He closed his eyes and drew in a slow breath. When he reopened them, he found her staring back at him, her amber eyes imbued with the same longing that lived in him. She was tailored made for him, lock and key, she fit him to heart wrenching perfection. Dominic gripped her hips, the unrelenting hold burrowing into her flesh as his face tightened, the pleasure flowing through him a little too much to bear. She set the pace, in control of them both, the headiness of pleasure intensifying on every downward motion. Incapable of remaining idle, he met every falling movement with an answering upward thrust. Her bouncing breasts hailed him to consume, grab and suck and lick to his heart’s content. It drove her crazy. Unable to handle the onslaught, she buried her face in the crook of his neck as she rode the wave of pleasure. His arm spanned her waist to gain better purchase as he frantically thrust into her. Her labored breathing came hot and fast, and her teeth clamped down on his skin. She clenched around him, bathing his cock in volcanic fire, and he felt her coming, her orgasm spearing through her body and aiming for his.

Dominic had never come harder in his life; his whole body seized by impending release. His hands threaded through her hair, completely primal, his mouth finding hers and melding tongues.

Round two was on the gargantuan bed she hadn’t slept on for nearly a year and half now. She was naked and he joined her. Words were not meant for this moment but the way he looked at her, like hunger was his first name and devouring her was his sole purpose in life, spoke well enough for them both. His movements were sharp, unhurried as he undressed, first removing his shirt one agonizing button at a time before shrugging it off and tossing it aside. Eden watched him far more carefully than she ever had before. Impervious to the flush heating her face, her eyes caressed every contour, noting the broadness of his shoulders, the length of muscled arms that led to big hands with short, square fingernails.

He had a long torso, pecs, and abs that provoked the urge to run her tongue down the ridges and taste the burnt peaches of his skin. A tapered waist barely held on to his slacks that hung partially open, belt undone and clicking softly with his fluid movements. When he finally eased out of those slacks, it was only the burning lack of air to her lungs that finally made Eden draw in a breath, but even then swallowing her tongue still posed a threat. His length was impressive, but then she’d known it would be. She wasn’t an expert on the subject by any means, but Dominic, in Eden’s opinion, had the Heisman of cocks. The wicked, slutty part of her that she rarely ever allowed out wanted to cast it in rubber and use it when he was away on business. Almost like he knew what she was thinking, the corner of his mouth upturned into a sexy, wicked sort of grin that shouldn’t have made her feel so breathless. Her heart jumped to her throat when he descended on the bed, swooping in to claim her mouth in a surge of male dominance, making her ache once again for his mastery.

“Dominic,” she gasped when he released her, calling his name as though it would draw her from the encompassing fog that clouded her minded.

“You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this,” he said huskily, his green eyes glowing with something far more than his arousal, something that urged Eden to reach out and touch the hard lines of his face. He closed the gap between them, the kiss leading him down her neck until he found her left breasts, opening his mouth to take in a nipple, swirling his hot, silky tongue until the tip was a dark red bud. He did the same with the right, the hot wet strokes of his tongue across the too sensitive tip had her body bowing, arching off the bed to offer more of herself for him to devour. Her gasping moans filled the air as his hand traced a path down the length of her body, a path that his mouth followed with the utmost precision, the details of her skin, every blemish, every scar, nearly every pore he savored.

When that exploring hand gently pried her thighs apart, he discovered her garden, the fountain at her center overflowing with her essence, drenching his fingers. Burnished eyes watched her intently as he brought those slick fingers to his mouth, sucking on index and middle as though it were icing on a cake. “I could live off your sweetness, Eden,” he said against her thigh, covering her center with his hungry mouth, shattering the fabric of her reality and dragging her into his world of unbridled carnality. A world where she was at the mercy of his hot tongue flicking mercilessly over her clit, as his fingers unfurled her wet lips to gain better access to her honeyed sex that he licked with selfish abandon. Every stroke of wet tongue coincided with the two fingers he buried inside her volcanic center. Blinded to anything else but the liquid fire burning through her, Eden clutched the sheets beneath her, powerless to do anything else but writhe helplessly and raise her hips to rock desperately with the unrelenting motion of his tongue as he feasted on her, a willing sacrifice at his alter.

Nonsensical words spilled from her mouth, begging him not to stop as that precious little death beckoned her to jump. But he dragged her from the precipice, curbed the building explosion, and smothered her protesting mewl with a searing kiss that turned into a deep gasp as he entered her in one long deep thrust, burying himself to the hilt. The level of pleasure surging through her was too much; she was going to faint, her head was swimming, every cell in her body blazing, overstimulated, but there was nowhere for her to run, there was nothing else for her to do but follow his insatiable lead, open herself wantonly to cradle him to her.

“Too fucking long,” he breathed near her ear, his ragged breath blowing hot against her flushed cheeks. He trapped her hands above her head. Interlacing their fingers, he captured her kissed bruised mouth in a slow and deep kiss that matched the rhythm of his plunging thrusts. “Look at me,” his command was a gentle imploration that Eden could not ignore. Her breath was his breath, intoxicated by the potency of their passion, unguarded green eyes anchored glowing amber and in that singular moment, in that raw and naked flow of their brief eternity something they had denied for too long was defined. Beyond the shallow depths, she saw herself in his reflective gaze; she saw how he saw her and the intensity there frightened her beyond reason. It was too powerful to speak into words. Too precious, too new, but it vibrated between them like a living entity, so palpable that they felt it on their sweat slicked bodies. It raised goose bumps and brought tears to Eden’s eyes. She tasted it in his kiss, felt it in the way he touched her, the way he grabbed at her thigh, and raised it higher up on his waist to drive in deeper than she’d ever felt him before. He took her fast, and she matched the cantering to and fro motion with ease. His feelings were made real, manifesting themselves in the way he possessed her. She felt his burning, desperate intensity, his unwillingness to break free of this moment, his need to stretch it further, make it last and last so that reality never caught them. He spoke what he could not say in kisses that she understood, and she responded with gasps, whimpers, and moans, clutching at him like life itself depended on it. He slammed into her with unrepentant vigor, over and over and over again, the rhythm maddening, urgent, and erratic. He made sure that she saw him, made sure that with every gasping breath she took, she took him into every cell of her body. Deep within the feminine mantle that clutched him tighter than a vise, he tattooed his name in slick magma, staking claim where no other man would dare trespass.

Euphoria leveled her, speared through her body, and overflowed; it was too much for her to withstand. She went willingly when it shoved her over the edge, and she fell happily into the arms of her little death. Her orgasm rippled and she milked him of his as he grunted and groaned above her, “Eden.” The bare utterance of her name was said in sweet reverence. “Eden.” And again he whispered it, against her cheek this time, a life line he clung to with unfailing strength.

There was nothing but the symphony of their ragged breaths playing against the walls of the bedroom. He eased out of her and rolled to the side but a possessive arm around her waist kept them entangled, limbs entwined and bodies drenched, neither one seemed inclined to move. Silence washed over them, the ardor temporarily satiated, and they basked in coital bliss. She felt the lazy swirls of his fingertips sliding along the curve of her hip, gliding up to her waist and when they reached near her ribcage she twitched. “Don’t,” she whispered drowsily.

“Don’t what?” he asked blithely, fingertips descending once again.

“Don’t tickle me.”

“Are you ticklish?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

The unexpected sound of his laughter filled Eden with an odd sense of elation, the rich, full sound washing over her like a cool wave. She looked at him beneath the veil of her lashes and found herself admiring the subtle changes, the look of amusement was something she had never had the privileged of seeing until now. Her fingers lifted of their own accord to his mouth, committing the imprint of that unguarded smile to memory, so that when she returned to her room it would be the source of her dreams. He puckered his lips against her fingertips, giving them a gentle kiss. “There are a lot of things I would like to know about you,” he said gruffly. “I’ve missed you.” He followed the admission with an indolent trace of his tongue across her dewy mouth. “Not just your body, Eden, but you.”

There went her heart again. The traitorous pumping organ jolted at the words he spoke so tenderly, convinced of the sincerity of feelings behind them. Eden rolled onto her back and covered her eyes with the back of her arm, needing to shut out the intensity bleeding from the green eyes she no longer recognized. She couldn’t do this. She would not do this. She’d wanted her visit in this fantasy to last a little while longer, but she could not stay here, because here, this room, this bed, the emotions she felt, were not real. And reality was very quick to reiterate that fact as it intruded on her thoughts and opened crevices where her doubts lay dormant. It preyed on her fears and demanded access to the foolish heart that held on to hope and craved his love like a sinner at God’s feet.

“You can’t say things like that.” Not when I’m steps away from being free from you. The words remained unspoken, a scalding steel rod roasting in her throat. She sat up in an instant, feeling a sudden overwhelming loss of control. Tension she hadn’t known in some time coiled inside her like a snake ready to strike at the slightest hint of provocation. He reached for her and she recoiled. “Don’t,” she said tensely.

“Talk to me,” he urged.

She shot to her feet and looked at him, impervious of her nudity. “You don’t get to do this, Dominic.” The look she gave him shredded Dominic. “I’m still so angry with you, but at the same time my heart breaks for you because of what you went through. I know you have your demons, and I can’t begin to understand how hard it’s been for you. But you’ve created my demons; you’ve made it so that I can’t trust you. You’ve made me fear you.”

“I would never hurt you,” he said with conviction.

“You already have,” she whispered, blinking away tears so that he wouldn’t see her weakness. “I don’t know what you want from me—”

He was there before she could finish, her face in his hands, his forehead resting against hers, there was nowhere else for her to look but up into eyes on fire. “I want you to tell me how to make it better.”

“How can you make it better when we’re already so broken? How can you make it better when I’m so afraid to let you in?”

“Don’t…don’t give up on me,” he entreated. “I know I can be the man you deserve, Eden.”

Eden closed her eyes, squeezed them tight, and in doing so the tears she’d wanted to prevent fell in earnest silently down her cheeks. Biting her quivering bottom lip so that she did not embarrass herself further, she sniffled and reopened her eyes. “Be the father our son deserves.” She swallowed around the lump in her throat. “He needs you.” She slipped away and just before she could break away completely he clamped a hand around her wrist.

“I need you.”

She shook her head, refusing to look back at him. “I’ve already given you what you wanted.” She turned and left him with only a ghost of her impression.

Chapter Nineteen