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Chapter Forty-One

“hello, elizabeth.” sam’s mother opened her front door wider

and welcomed her in.

“Hi, Fiona,” Elizabeth said, stepping in. Fiona had been taking Eliza-

beth’s relationship with Ivan so well during the past few weeks; they hadn’t discussed it directly, but Fiona was being as polite as she always had. Elizabeth was thankful there was no awkwardness between them. Unfortunately, she was worried Sam hadn’t taken it as well. “I came around to have a chat with Sam if that’s OK, Luke is so upset without him.”

Fiona looked at her sadly. “I know, I’ve been trying to talk to him all week about it, maybe you can do a better job than me.”

“Has he told you what it’s about?”

Fiona tried to hide a smile and nodded.

“Is it about Ivan?” Elizabeth asked with worry. She had always worried

that Sam would be jealous of the amount of time Ivan was spending with

her and Luke, and so she had invited him over to the house and included him in Ivan’s activities, as much as possible.

“Yes,” Fiona answered with a broad smile. “Six-year-olds can be funny

can’t they?” Elizabeth relaxed at finally learning Fiona hadn’t a problem with the time she and Luke had spent with Ivan, and was putting it down to Sam’s behavior.

“I’ll let him tell you in his own words,” she continued, leading Elizabeth 289

C e c e l i a A h e r n

through her home. She had to fight the urge to look around to see if Ivan was there. As much as she was here to help Luke she was also trying to help herself; finding and returning two best friends was better than one and she ached to be with Ivan so much.

Fiona pushed open the playroom door and Elizabeth entered. “Sam,

honey, Luke’s mom is here to talk to you,” she said gently and for the first time, Elizabeth experienced a warm glow when she heard those words.

Sam paused the PlayStation and looked up at her with sad brown eyes.

Fiona left them alone to talk.

“Hi, Sam,” she said gently. “Mind if I sit down?”

He shook his head and she balanced herself on the edge of the couch.

“Luke tells me you don’t want to be his friend anymore, is that

right?”

Unashamedly, he nodded his head.

“Do you want to tell me why?”

He took a moment to ponder that and then nodded. “I don’t like to play

the same games as him.”

“Did you tell him this?”

He nodded.

“And what did he say?”

Sam looked confused and shrugged his shoulders. “He is weird.”

A lump formed in Elizabeth’s throat and she was immediately defen-

sive. “What do you mean, weird?”

“At first it was funny but then it just got boring and I didn’t want to play anymore, but Luke wouldn’t stop.”

“What game is that?”

“The games with his invisible friend.” He put on a bored voice and made a face.

Elizabeth’s hands grew clammy. “But his invisible friend was only

around for a few days and that was months ago, Sam.”

Sam gave her a funny look. “But you played with him too.”

Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “Excuse me?”

“Ivan what’s his face,” he grumbled. “Boring old Ivan who just wants



I f Yo u C o u l d S e e M e N o w

to spin on chairs all day, or have mud fights or play chasing. Every single day it was Ivan, Ivan, Ivan and”—his already squeaky voice raised a pitch—

“I couldn’t even see him!”

“What?” Elizabeth was confused. “You couldn’t see him? What do you

mean?”

Sam thought hard about how he could explain that. “I mean, I couldn’t

see him,” he said, simply shrugging his shoulders.

“But you played with him all the time.” She ran her clammy fingers

through her hair.

“Yeah, because Luke was, but I got sick of pretending and Luke

wouldn’t stop, he kept saying he was real.” He rolled his eyes.

Elizabeth placed her fingers on the bridge of her nose. “I don’t know

what you mean, Sam. Ivan is your mum’s friend, is he not?”

Sam’s eyes widened, he had a startled expression. “Eh, nope.”

“No?”

“No,” he confirmed.

“But Ivan minded you and Luke, he collected you and brought you

home,” Elizabeth stammered.

Sam looked worried. “I’m allowed to walk home by myself, Ms. Egan. I

only live two doors away.”

“But the eh, the em . . .” Elizabeth suddenly snapped to attention, re-

membering something; she clicked her fingers, making Sam jump. “The

water fight, what about the water fight in the back garden, it was you, me, Luke, and Ivan, remember that?” she probed. “Remember, Sam?”

His face paled, he nodded slowly, and he said, “There was only three

of us.”

“What?” she shouted louder than she meant to.

Sam’s face crumpled up and he began to cry silently.

“Oh, no.” She panicked. “Please don’t cry, Sam, I didn’t mean to.” She

held her hands out to him but he ran toward the door, shouting for his

mother. “Oh, I’m sorry Sam, please stop. Ssshhh,” she said quietly. “Oh god,” she groaned to herself, listening as Fiona hushed him.

“I’m sorry, Fiona,” Elizabeth apologized.

C e c e l i a A h e r n

“It’s OK.” Fiona looked a little worried. “He’s a little sensitive about it.”

“I understand.” Elizabeth gulped. “About Ivan.” She swallowed again

and got to her feet. “You know him, don’t you?”

Fiona’s brow wrinkled. “What do you mean by know him?”

Elizabeth’s heart raced. “I mean, he’s been around here before?”

“Oh, yes.” Fiona smiled. “He was here many times with Luke, we even

had him over for dinner.” She winked.

Elizabeth relaxed, but was unsure of how to interpret the wink. She

placed her hand on her heart and it began to slow down. “Phew, Fiona,

thank god.” She laughed with relief. “For a minute there, I thought I was going mad.”

“Oh, don’t be silly.” Fiona laughed, placing a hand on her arm. “We all do it, you know. When Sam was two years old, he went through the exact

same thing. Rooster, he called his little friend.” She laughed. “So believe me, I know exactly what you’re going through, opening car doors, cooking extra dinners, and setting an extra place at the table. Don’t worry, I understand, you were right to play along.”

Elizabeth’s head was beginning to spin, but Fiona’s voice kept going on and on.

“When you think about it, it’s such a waste of food really, isn’t it? It just sits there through the entire meal completely untouched and believe me I know, I was keeping an eye on it. I’ll have no spooky invisible men in this house, thank you very much!” She laughed.

Moisture was rising to Elizabeth’s throat. She grabbed on to the corner of the chair to steady herself.

“But, like I said earlier, that’s six-year-olds for you. I’m sure this so-called Ivan will disappear in time; they say they don’t last for more than two months, really, he should be gone soon, don’t you worry.” She finally stopped talking, but moved her face quizzically toward Elizabeth. “Are

you OK?”

“Air,” Elizabeth gasped. “I just need to get some air.”

“Of course,” Fiona said, hurriedly leading her back toward the front

door.

Elizabeth charged outside, taking in big gulps of air.

I f Yo u C o u l d S e e M e N o w

“Is everything OK? Can I get you a glass of water?” Fiona asked

worriedly, rubbing her back as Elizabeth leaned over facing the ground, with her hands resting on her knees.

“No, thanks,” she said, quietly standing up. “I’ll be OK.” She wan-

dered off unevenly down the path without a good-bye, leaving Fiona staring after her nervously.

Once back in her own house, Elizabeth slammed the front door behind

her and slid down to the floor with her head in her hands.

“Elizabeth, what’s wrong?” Luke asked worriedly, still in his pajamas

and barefoot as he stood before her.

She couldn’t answer. She could do nothing but go over the past few

months, over and over in her mind, all her special memories and moments with Ivan, all their conversations together. Who was there with them, who had seen them, spoken to him. They had been in crowded places, people

had seen them together, Benjamin had seen them, and Joe had seen them.

She kept on thinking back over everything, trying to remember moments

when Ivan had conversations with all of these people. She couldn’t be

imagining all this. She was a sane, responsible woman.

Her face was pale as she finally looked up to face Luke.

“Ekam Eveileb,” was all she could say.

“Yep.” He giggled. “It’s backwards language. Cool, isn’t it?”

It took Elizabeth seconds to work it out.

Make Believe.


Date: 2015-04-20; view: 441


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