Getting Caught

Cassie

Jack talked Ruth into letting us move in as soon as possible, saying he wanted to know I’d be safe while he was on the road for eleven days. The move kept my brain occupied, so instead of focusing on the fact that Jack would be gone for so long, I thought about packing instead. It stopped me from my small freak-outs about Jack and cheating. I didn’t want to worry about him doing that, but sometimes you can’t help the way you feel.

We spent the following week packing up our small apartment, and I stayed away from the field when Jack wasn’t pitching to have more time to get everything in order. I realized that I didn’t like staying home when Jack’s team played a home game. I thought I’d feel differently because Jack wasn’t pitching, but I didn’t. I wanted to be where he was, whether he was playing or not.

But being away from the field also meant that there were no pictures of me online and that small reprieve brought a sense of normalcy back into my life I’d almost forgotten. It’s amazing how quickly we adapt to things in our lives when we believe we don’t have a choice in the matter.

I closed the top of a box, taping it shut as Jack walked through the front door. I smiled, jumping to my feet to greet him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and nuzzled against his warm skin. “Hi, babe. How was the game?”

“I don’t like it when you’re not there,” he admitted, and a part of me melted with his words.

“Me either.” I closed my eyes, breathing in the smell of him.

“And we lost.” His tone turned grumpy and annoyed.

“I’m sorry.”

He leaned down, giving me a quick peck on the mouth before walking into the kitchen. “I’m hungry, Kitten, and everything’s packed.” He opened and closed our cupboards.

“There’s pasta in the fridge that I made for dinner. Just needs to be heated up.”

He turned toward the refrigerator and opened the door. “Oh, here,” he said, reaching into his back pocket. He pulled out a folded-up piece of paper and tossed it at me.

“What is it?”

“It’s the detailed travel itinerary for the next few games.”

“Oh.” I unfolded it. “Is this my copy or do I need to write this all down somewhere?”

“That’s all yours. I have mine in my locker.”

“Thanks.” I scanned the paper looking for his flight time. I breathed out with relief when it read six p.m. “I’m so happy that your flight isn’t until six.”

“I know. It’s only about two and half hours to Miami from here so we lucked out.” He flashed a quick dimpled grin before the microwave beeped, signaling his food was ready.

I nodded and scanned the bare living room. “I didn’t think it could look any smaller in here, but it actually does. Which really makes no sense.”

“Our new place is going to feel like a palace to you.”

“I may never leave our bathroom,” I teased and he raised an eyebrow. “You don’t even know what I’m talking about because you didn’t even look at it. Just wait until you see it!”

I started getting really excited. Our new apartment looked amazing, and I couldn’t wait to begin living there. “Matteo knows we’re moving, right? You told him?”

He nodded before swallowing a mouthful of food. “I told him. He knows exactly where it is.”

I started going through the checklist in my head. Utilities changed over and turned on, old apartment cleaned, movers booked, house packed, and address updated online and with the post office. “Kitten?” Jack’s voice broke through my overly organized brain.

“Hmm?”

“Did you hear a word I said?”

I shook my head. “Sorry. What’d you say?”

“I asked if you thought about coming to any of the away games.”

“I was going to ask you if I could come to the Chicago series.” I plopped down on the couch.

“Ask me? Kitten, you can come to every fucking game if you want. You don’t have to ask me.”

“Well, I’ve never been to Chicago.” I smiled, picturing Cloud Gate, the famous stainless-steel bean-shaped sculpture that people always talked about. I wanted to photograph that bean.

The couch dipped as Jack sat next to me. “Alright, but listen. Chicago is a really big city that sometimes isn’t safe. Since you’ll be alone, I don’t think you should take the El around town. Just take cabs.”

“The L?” I asked.

“It’s Chicago’s train system, which I’m sure is fine but I’ll lose my shit thinking about you riding around on it alone.”

“I take the trains in New York alone all the time. It can’t be that different.”

“It’s probably not. But I’d feel better if you just took cabs.”

“OK. I’ll take cabs.” I agreed before feeling small nerves tingle up and down my spine. I needed to get used to traveling to strange places alone. Not only was it a part of dating Jack, but it was a part of my future career as well. My job assignments were almost always guaranteed to be in unfamiliar territory.

“I’m not kidding, Kitten. And as much as I want you there, now I’m freaking out at the idea of you being there alone.” His eyebrows pulled together.

“I won’t be alone. I’ll be with you.”

He shook his head. “Not really. I’ll be at the field most of the time. I don’t think there’s a day I’m even around for lunch. We’re gone before then.”

“That sucks.” I understood now why the wives didn’t go to the away games.

Jack’s shoulders squared as he faced me. “I know it’s a lot of alone time. You don’t have to come.”

“I want to. I should at least see what it’s like, right? Maybe I’ll like having time to explore,” I offered, unsure of whom I was trying to convince, me or him.

The tension on his face remained. “Maybe we should fly Matteo out so you aren’t alone?”

I jerked my head back in surprise. “No! We’re not bringing Matteo! Are you insane?”

“It was just a thought.”

“Well, stop thinking like that. I don’t want Matteo to go everywhere I go.” I imagined the field day the local press would have with that.

Jack reached over, grabbing my hand in his. “I worry about you is all.”

“I know, but at some point you need to let me be a big girl and take care of myself. I was perfectly fine here before you came, you know.” His expression fell, and I knew I’d hurt him. “That’s not how I meant it. I just meant that I didn’t need a babysitter before.”

“You weren’t being hounded by the press or fans before either.”

“That’s true,” I admitted, my stomach fluttering with the thought.

“I know you think I’m crazy, Kitten, but I can’t function if I’m worried about you.” He lowered his head, and a horrible feeling crept over me. I hated being the source of his pain.

“I don’t think you’re crazy, but I hate that I cause you so much stress.”

His dark eyes turned to my face. “You don’t cause me stress. I cause me stress because I can’t relax when it comes to you. Because I love you so damn much.”

I didn’t know how to respond. Jack made me fully aware that I was his number one priority in life, and I’d never experienced that feeling before. I stared at him, allowing my own feelings for him to circulate throughout every ounce of my body. Feeling heavy with my own emotions, I longed to lighten the mood.

“Does it matter what time I land on Friday?”

He brought my hand to his lips and kissed across my knuckles. “Even if you book a flight that gets in when I do, I’m not allowed to ride with you to the hotel. So don’t worry about trying to coordinate your flight with mine or anything.”

“Alright. I’ll just fly out after work then.”

“So you might miss the game?”

“I shouldn’t. We have summer Fridays in the office now so we get to leave early.”

“What the hell are summer Fridays?” he scoffed.

I smiled. “This whole freaking city goes to the Hamptons on the summer weekends. So everyone gets off early on Friday so they can drive up there.”

“Shut the hell up.”

I laughed. “I’m not kidding.”

“Could you imagine if we did that shit in LA? What would we have, Malibu Fridays?”

“Beach house Fridays!” I yelled.

Jack smiled and tilted his head. “You’re so adorable. I love you so much.”

His words pierced like an arrow into my lungs, causing me to catch my breath. “I love you too.”

“What time do the movers get here tomorrow?”

“Eight.” I looked around one last time. “I got everything, right?”

Jack turned his head in all directions, scanning our tiny living space. “Looks like it to me. You did good, Kitten.”

“Thanks.” My cheeks warmed with his compliment as his hand cupped my face.

“We should leave this place with a bang.”

“What do you have in mind?” I sucked at my lower lip.

“I think you know.” He pushed off from the couch before slipping his hands under me and lifting me up. “I think I have two quarters in my pocket.” His tongue swept across my lips as he carried me into our tiny bedroom one last time.

We moved into our new apartment the following morning, and Jack was on a flight that evening. But not before building our new bed frame, two sets of bookshelves, and a new dresser. He promised he’d put together everything so I wouldn’t have to.

I adored the man he was becoming for me.

For us.

Chicago Friday finally rolled around, and I landed at Midway airport around four. Jack’s game at Wrigley didn’t start until seven thirty, but he was already at the field. I hopped a cab to the hotel like Jack insisted and watched the city come into view. Even through the backseat window, I sensed the difference between this city and New York. I assumed they’d be similar, but they weren’t.

Both cities had numerous tall buildings, but that was pretty much where their similarities ended. While New York appeared dirty and lived in, Chicago was spotless and trash free, newer maybe. And where New York buzzed with constant energy, Chicago exuded more of a gentle hum.

I checked in at the hotel on the bank of the Chicago River and ordered room service while I killed time before the game. I looked out the window at the water down below and the city that surrounded me. Chicago had a style all its own, and I smiled as I thought about capturing it with my camera. I’d have plenty of time for that tomorrow.

When I arrived at the stadium, I almost spent the entire evening staring at the WRIGLEY FIELD, HOME OF THE CHICAGO CUBS sign. It was such a classic piece of baseball memorabilia that I found myself awed by it. I took a few shots of the aged red-and-white sign, loving everything about it, before picking up my lone ticket waiting for me at guest relations. I passed through the dark entrance, lost in the excitement of a new-to-me stadium.

Once inside, I wandered alone, going the wrong direction at first before turning around. I wondered if any of the mean girls would be here. Aside from Trina, there wasn’t anyone I wanted to see. Three text messages later, and I found out Trina was still out of the country on her job. I scanned the row of green seats searching for mine. I dropped into my chair before looking around. I found myself surrounded by a few pretty, college-aged girls, but no one that looked familiar. My shoulders relaxed at the absence of any mean girls. I didn’t realize how stressed out they made me feel until they weren’t around.

Without the distraction of the usual fans or the mean wives, I concentrated completely on watching Jack play. The way he focused always impressed me. He seemed like another person entirely when he stood on that mound of dirt. He blocked out every sound, every shout, every yell, and zoned in one hundred percent on the batter standing sixty feet away.

And when he gave up a hit, he gathered his composure and refocused his energy, unlike some of the other pitchers who became completely rattled when someone got a hit off them. In a game in which your state of mind could make or break you, Jack had the ability to keep it together. His temper off the field never translated on it. Jack always moved forward, putting the last play behind him and focused on the next one.

His passion and sheer respect for the game he loved only made me love him more. I admired the way Jack played ball. It showed a lot of internal character to pitch the way he did. He was focused, determined, and played with a full heart. How can you not love that?

When the game ended, I asked three different security guards for directions to the visiting team’s locker room. With my ID card in hand, I wandered underground and waited for Jack to emerge. It was odd being the only person waiting. Players started to walk out of the locker room, each one flashing me a quick smile before walking away. I wondered if they even knew who I was. I hadn’t really met any of the players since Jack, and I didn’t spend time with them socially.

Trina’s boyfriend Kyle walked out, and I smiled. “Hey, Cass. Jack’s on his way out,” he said, before giving me a quick hug.

“Thanks. Tell Trina I miss her.”

He laughed. “I sure will. See you later.” He waved as he walked down the corridor out of view.

Jack walked out moments later, his hair still wet from the shower. I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed. “Great game, babe.”

“Thanks,” he whispered before kissing my lips.

He led me outside where the team bus rumbled. “I’m sorry you have to take a cab back to the hotel.”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine. I should be able to ride with you instead of sending you off alone at eleven o’clock on a Friday night.”

“I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.” I tried to reassure him, but I sensed that he was uncomfortable.

“I’ll wait with you until you get a cab.” He grabbed my hand and walked me toward the busy street.

“You don’t have to do that, Jack. I don’t want you to get in trouble.”

“Half the team isn’t even out of the locker room yet. It’s fine.”

Hailing a cab took longer than I anticipated. It was a Friday night and the majority of the taxis driving past me were already filled with passengers. I started to worry that Jack would have to leave me alone when an empty cab came our way and Jack hailed it.

“Thanks, baby.” I craned my neck up to give him a kiss before hopping inside.

“I’ll see you at the hotel,” he said before shutting my door for me.

I arrived before the team bus, so I stepped inside the grand lobby and waited. I almost headed into the bar when Jack’s warning coursed through my mind.

Don’t look in there, Cass. Jack told you not to look.

But the team’s not even here yet. What could I possibly see?

I argued with myself mentally before caving and turning my head to peer inside the bar area. I spotted the three college girls who were sitting near me during the game. One of the girls waved her hand in my direction as if recognizing me from earlier, and I quickly averted my eyes.

Holy shit. Those girls were sitting in the player ticket section?

The team barreled into the hotel lobby, making a loud scene as they entered. I scanned the burly men, searching for Jack. Kymber’s husband passed by me without a glance, and I watched as he turned into the bar.

No fucking way.

I observed the scene unfolding like a car crash before my eyes. I couldn’t look away if I tried. He sauntered into the bar as one of the blonde girls hopped up from her stool and into his arms. She giggled as he gripped her ass, giving it a couple of smacks, much to her delight. She wrapped her legs around his waist, planting kisses all over his lying, cheating, rat-bastard face. Two more players, both married, entered the bar and a similar scene unfolded. I wanted to puke.

My jaw dropped wide open as all the feelings of Jack cheating on me poured into my bloodstream. My stomach churned, threatening to empty its contents all over the shiny tile floor. Jack suddenly appeared in front of me, his expression grim. “I told you not to look in the bar, Kitten. I told you.”

“Holy shit.” I shook my head, still shocked at the blatant display of infidelity and my own hellish flashbacks.

Jack grabbed my arm and led me toward the elevator. “That’s why I said no bar. And that’s why we’re on a different floor than they are. So you don’t have to see that shit. Come on.”

I stumbled as I tried to keep pace with Jack, who was clearly desperate to remove me from the area. “I can’t believe they act that way in public. Aren’t they worried about getting caught?”

Jack eyed me. “Not here.”

“Huh?”

Jack’s lips tightened. “We’re not talking about this here. Wait until we’re in our room.”

“Oh.” I sighed.

Stepping out of the elevator, we walked down the long corridor toward our room. I ran my fingers across the wallpaper as Jack pressed the card key into the slot. With two clicks, he pushed on the door, holding it for me to enter before he followed. He lay down on top of the bed.

“They aren’t worried about getting caught because everyone already knows.”

“You’re trying to tell me that Kymber the bitch knows her husband is a cheating piece of shit?” I asked, my tone clearly reflecting my disbelief.

He huffed. “Not in so many words, but yeah.”

“So she knows he’s cheating on her, and what? She just doesn’t care?”

I couldn’t fathom how anyone in their right mind wouldn’t care about being betrayed in that way. What kind of relationship was that anyway?

“I don’t know if she really knows, but I know she suspects it.”

“And she doesn’t care enough to find out for sure?”

“She probably doesn’t really want to know the answer. The reality is that a lot of these guys cheat on their wives, Kitten. It’s a really shitty fact, but it’s the truth. And yeah, the wives usually know, but they just pretend it’s not happening.”

“Like they’re in denial?” I shook my head, still trying to comprehend it all. I thought about Kymber and her crew of mean girls, and felt sorry for them.

“Either that or they just pretend it’s not happening because they like their lives.”

I shook my head, refusing to believe such craziness. “No way. All the material things they get are more important to them than being respected, or treated well, or truly loved?”

“I think it’s really easy to get accustomed to a certain lifestyle. And they’d rather not give it up.” He tousled his dark hair before pressing his head against the wall.

That entire concept seemed foreign to me. I wondered what caused a person to convince themselves that the trade-off was worth it. Who needed self-esteem and self-worth when you had big diamonds and expensive clothes? “Well, don’t you get any ideas, Mr. Carter, because that kind of crap will never fly with me.”

My eyes started to mist, my heart aching with the realization that he already did do that to me. The whole cheating, my knowing about it, basically accepting it, and welcoming him back with open arms. It all happened.

“Kitten, I would never do to you what they’re doing to their wives. I think they’re assholes. Especially the guys with kids.” He patted the bed. “Come here.”

I moved to lie down next to him, and he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. “I know you aren’t like those other women. And I wouldn’t like you if you were.” His lips pressed against the side of my head. “I made a mistake before, but it won’t happen again. I know you’d leave me forever if I did and I can’t…” he paused, “I won’t lose you again.”

Date: 2015-02-28; view: 712