Chapter Ten

Clear as Mud

It’s a cool March evening and we decide to sit outside and enjoy the view of the ocean. It’s much quieter at night on the beach. There are no cars driving up and down the street. There are no noisy seabirds searching for food on the beach. Quiet solitude. Evan lights the fire pit, puts on his playlist, and gets us a blanket.

“I’ll be right back. Sit tight.” He returns quickly with two glasses of wine and climbs under the blanket with me. Evan extends his arm and invites me in. His body heat immediately warms me and I tingle from the sensation.

Evan catches me completely by surprise when he offers a toast. “Here’s to unexpected gifts. May we recognize them when they arrive and strive to deserve them always.” He kisses me, and we both take a sip of wine.

“Can I ask you something, Evan?” I’m feeling a little bolder and braver right now. "You say the sweetest things and make me feel so special. How many times have you done this before?”

Evan looks at me and sighs. “That depends on what you mean by ‘this’.”

Knowing that this conversation needs to happen, I find the strength to ask the question that has been burning in the back of my mind from the first moment I saw him. “I’m curious about how many ... I mean I was wondering if you ever ... I don’t know how to say this.”

“Juliette, do you want to know how many women I’ve slept with or how many women I’ve fallen for?” The words don’t come, so I shrug my shoulders and nod. “Those are two completely different questions.”

Completely different questions? I don’t see how. For me, sex has always required a certain amount of intimacy. It involves trust and caring, along with desire. “Both, I guess.”

“Why? It’s history. A history I’m not terribly proud of. If you know everything about my past, I’m afraid there won’t be a future for us.” I look over at him, and his expression has changed. There’s a sadness in his eyes that wasn’t there before. I know this is something that he doesn’t want to share with me. But if we’re going to build something together, it’s got to be built on a solid foundation.

“I need to know a little about your past. It will help me understand you. You’re so good at the romance part of this ... the seduction. I need to know if that’s all this is to you, a challenge.” There, I’ve finally said it. I want to be with him in every way, but not if finally giving myself to him will be our undoing.

“You do challenge me, but not in the ways you think. You’re so different from any of the other women I’ve ever known.” He pauses, trying to find the right words. He runs his hands through his hair and he’s no longer looking at me. “I don’t know how to say this without sounding cocky. But I’ve never had to try very hard to find women who wanted to be with me. They would openly flirt with me, give me their numbers, and offer to take me home. And none of them,” he grabs my chin and tilts my head to look up at him, “have ever gotten under my skin the way you have.”

“Evan, there must have been others.” I look into his eyes, searching for any signs of dishonesty; but he looks deep into me and I know he’s telling me the truth.

“None. Never. It’s always been just about the sex. Not just for me, but for them, too.”

“What about a high school sweetheart? You must have been Prom King or Homecoming King, or something.”

“I’ve dated, a lot. But it was never ... serious. I’ve never led any of them to believe there was anything more going on than there actually was. I may be guilty of a lot of things, Juliette, but I was not dishonest with any of them.”

His answer doesn’t seem right. How is it possible? “Didn’t you ever want more?”

“Not with any of them. They didn’t know me, they didn’t want me, the real me. They wanted something from me, and I gladly let them have it.” He breaks our connection and looks away from me and down at his hands.

I touch his arm to bring him back to me, “So what happened?”

“Well, I guess things kind of caught up with me. There were a lot of things I didn’t take seriously in my life, women were just one part of it.” His hands are now rubbing his face, like he’s trying to wipe away the memories.

“Is that why you moved? Why you left Houston?”

“Mostly. Maybe someday I can tell you more, but right now, please don’t ask. I don’t want what we have here and now to be shadowed by my past mistakes.” He looks right into my eyes and I can see the sincerity in his words. “Until now, I’ve never wanted to do better. I’ve never wanted to be better. I’ve never wanted someone the way I want you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Right now, I can’t imagine being with anyone else. When you’re not with me, I’m thinking about the next time I will see you. When you’re hurt, I want to make you better. There’s a primal instinct in me that makes me want to protect you and make you happy.” He takes a long pause before he continues. “I never thought I would feel this way. I never thought I would want to feel this way.” He takes my hand and strokes it with his thumb. I love this feeling. I love being here with him.

“Evan, I feel it too ... that connection. I’ve been in and out of love before. At least I thought it was love. But it was different. I feel this pull towards you that I cannot fight. It was there the first time I saw you.”

“I remember that day on the beach when Maddy jumped all over me. Did I ever tell you? You haunted my dreams that night. The next day, when I saw you on the beach again, I was ready to make the first move. Something I don’t normally do. But then you got hurt. And you had sand all over your pretty face. I reached down to wipe it away and when I touched you, it was like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It was like a bolt of electricity that shot right to my heart. That’s when everything changed.” He looks at me with those big blue eyes and that face that I know I will never tire of seeing. I cuddle into his embrace a little deeper, wrapping my arms around his waist.

I admit, “I’m embarrassed to tell you how many nights you’ve visited me in my dreams since that day.” I’m glad he can’t see me blushing.

“I know.”

“Excuse me?”

“Last night, while you were sleeping in my bed ... well ... you kind of talked a little.” He looked down at me, grinning.

“What?”

“Well, I woke up first and you stirred a little. Next thing I know, you’re in my arms lying on my chest, sound asleep. I’ve never felt anything like it before.” He leans down and kisses me gently. “Then you said my name. Nothing else, just my name. It was the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”

He deepens our kiss and this time, our tongues twirl and caress, seeking more, wanting more, needing more. Evan turns his entire body, and presses himself against me. Slowly, I begin to lie back onto the sofa, bringing him with me. I comb my fingers through his hair and he lets out a soft groan. He’s hovering above me, hands planted on either side of me, and I melt into the cushions.

Our breaths grow ragged as he presses his mouth against mine. My body responds to his immediately, and I can feel my breasts straining against the silk of my bra, forming hard little points rubbing against the tightness of his chest.

He slips one knee between mine, and I move my hips just enough to feel him, fully erect and pressing against me. His hips begin to move in unison with my own, creating enough friction to make me slick with desire.

Slowly, cautiously, Evan’s hand is sliding across my middle, exploring my skin, and moving upwards towards my breasts. Every place his hand touches burns in the most delightful way. As our hips thrust and our tongues cavort, my hand travels to his ass. I find an opening beneath the waistband of his shorts and I rake my nails across his skin, reveling in the delight of feeling his body as it moves with mine.

His kisses move to my chin, behind my ear, then down my neck. Moist lips and wet tongue caress my shoulder. His hand finds its target as his thumb brushes against the tender peak of my breast. Instinctively, I arch my back enough to encourage him. I need to feel him; I want to feel his lips on every part of my body. I ache for him.

As his hand finds its way beneath the silk that separates us, I squeeze his ass. He cups my breast as his thumb and finger squeeze and twist. My legs respond first, freeing themselves from his binding pressure, and wrap around his thighs. His throbbing erection is becoming more demanding, seeking to find entrance between the junction of my thighs.

He is trailing kisses across my collarbone. My hands move up his body and explore the gloriously toned muscles of his back. Again, my nails scrape across his skin, causing him to release a deep moan. He pulls down on the neck of my top, releasing my breast to his desperate kisses. Immediately, his lips move to my breast, bathing me in his warm mouth. At first, he licks softly, slowly drawing on my nipple, feeling it grow tighter in his mouth. His tongue playfully toys with me while his teeth produce just enough pressure to send chills down my spine.

I find the hem of his shirt, and I tug it higher and higher, until he stops his hungry ministrations long enough to whip off his shirt and throw it to the ground. He pauses to look at me, offering me a chance to enjoy the site of his bare chest. My eyes soak in the curves and lines of his sculptured stomach. His hipbones expose a sexy v-line that disappears beneath his waistband.

He repays my desire to feel flesh on flesh by helping to remove my shirt and dropping it to the ground beside his own. He returns to tend to my swollen breast while his hand travels to my back, skillfully releasing my bra and freeing both my breasts for his explorations.

Gently, he lowers himself on top of me, allowing our bare skin to meet. His hand slides behind my back, and he pulls me closer to him. I allow my hands to grip the muscles on his bare arms and shoulders as they strain to maintain our bond. Our lips find each other and he kisses me gently, nibbling on my lip as my body hums with pleasure.

We break apart, gasping for breath. Evan gazes down at me and whispers, “Stay with me tonight.” Wordlessly, I nod and bite my bottom lip. Before I can process what’s happening, he scoops me up into his arms and carries me to his bedroom.

With a loud bang, he slams the door shut with his foot, and then carefully places my feet on the ground. “Are you sure this is okay? I want you so badly right now, but if it doesn’t feel right, we can stop.”

“Evan, please make love to me before I explode.” I eagerly step towards him, unbutton and unzip his shorts. He steps out of them, and standing before me is a magnificently naked man. My eyes follow his strong chest down to his six-pack abs. He is ready for me, and I ache to touch him. Cautiously, my fingers skim over his thick, hard length. I wrap my hand around him and my thumb glides across the tip and into the pearly liquid that awaits me. “God, you’re gorgeous.”

“Fuck, Juliette. If you keep that up, this is going to be over much quicker than I’d like.” He steps back and turns me away from him. His hand reaches across my belly, skimming across my skin as I lean back into him. I can feel his arousal pressing up against my back while he releases the button on my shorts and slides down the zipper. Evan slides his hand between my skin and panties. Slowly, his fingers explore the places where I need him the most, and I move my hips instinctively, urging his fingers to plunge inside me. His fingers tease me as they explore my wetness, tenderly caressing the soft folds of my sex. I find myself struggling to breathe as I feel a tightness begin to grow in my belly and spread below. The sensations are too strong to control and I am unable to think. Evan nibbles on my ear, causing all thoughts to disappear, leaving me to enjoy the impulses coursing through my body.

His palm rubs against me as his fingers find their entry, first one, then two. “You’re so wet for me,” he breathes. While one hand is buried deep inside, he reaches up and takes my breast into his free hand. Gently tugging on each nipple puts me over the edge, and the first wave of pleasurable explosions begin rippling through my body.

I reach down to remove his hand from between my legs while I slowly and deliberately bring his fingers to my lips. I slide his fingers inside my mouth, taking as much of him as I can, I close my lips on his fingers and suck. My tongue strokes his fingers and I moan as I slide my lips down to the tip of his fingers, then back up again.

Evan flips me around again so we are face to face. “Take these off. Now!” He eases my shorts and panties down as I help him remove them from my body. As if I weigh nothing, he lifts me up and I wrap my legs around him. He devours me with his urgent kisses as he carries me to his bed. He climbs on top of me, places an arm behind my waist, and glides me up to the center of the bed.

“Stay right here,” he demands as he reaches over to his dresser, “I have to get a condom.”

“I’m on the pill.” He smiles that earth-shattering, dimpled grin, returns to hover over me, and I wrap my arms around his neck. Slowly, passionately, he leans down and kisses me. My legs open for him as he rubs against me, teasing me. He continues to rub against me, circling his hips, making me slick with want. “Evan, please. I want you.”

“Where do you want me, Juliette? Tell me.” His words are a whisper in my ear, and my body quivers. I rock my hips to show him what I need. “Tell me, sweetheart.”

“I want you inside me, Evan. I need you inside me.” Slowly, so we can feel every sensation, he slides himself inside me. Inch by inch, he buries himself deep inside me until he reaches the hilt.

“You’re so tight. God, you feel good. Don’t move; I want to watch you, Juliette.” Hearing my name on his lips as he slowly withdraws from me is incredibly hot. He looks at me, biting his own lip as he slowly slides his length back inside me. I lift my knees so he can push in even deeper. I rock my hips again, feeling his body tense and throb. Our eyes are locked on each other, neither one of us breaking the connection.

I take a deep breath, inhaling his scent, as we move together. With each new movement, I watch his face for signs of pleasure. The sight of his sexy smile make my toes curl. Feelings invade my body that I have never felt before. “You are so beautiful. I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,” he whispers in my ear.

His hands find mine and we lace our fingers together. He plants his lips on mine, claiming me, owning me. He begins to move, filling me, and then draining me slowly. “Harder, Evan,” I thrust my hips towards him, wrap my legs around his legs, and gyrate and rub against him, pleading, “Please.”

“Oh, God, Juliette.” My legs release their grip on him, and he closes his eyes as he plunges back inside me. “Fuck,” he mutters as begins to move more quickly in and out. I match his thrusts and we find a satisfying rhythm. I dig my nails into his back and feel myself begin to tighten against him.

Our bodies fit together perfectly, forming a perfect union. The feeling of him inside me is so intense and my need for him is so great, it’s almost painful. Evan stops, momentarily, then slowly begins to build a rhythm again and I let out a cry of delight. I grab the sheets and hold on as I feel another wave of pure joy growing inside me. Almost on cue, Evan loops his arm beneath my knee, while his other hand slips between my legs, and his thumb finds my sweet spot. When he pounds into me, it’s almost too much for me to take. “Yes, sweetheart, I want to feel you. Let go!” Instantly, a mind-blowing orgasm tears through my body, and I squeeze down on him, taking him with me. He lets out a deep moan and I feel him shudder against me as he releases inside me and we climax together.

He lies on top of me, never breaking our connection. “Am I too heavy? I can move. Just give me a minute.”

“Please don’t move, stay with me,” and I close my eyes to enjoy the moment. This moment. Our moment.

He snakes his arms around my back, and rolls us both over, still maintaining our connection. Unnamed emotions fill the room. “I’m not going anywhere, Juliette. There’s no getting rid of me now.” He reaches up and gently moves hair away from my face and caresses my cheek.

I squirm a little, and a giggle slips from my lips. Evan eyes me suspiciously and asks, “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m way past okay.” I lightly run my fingers across his chest, and his eyes alight with passion. I slowly rock back and forth on top of him, igniting a fire in him that grows and fills me again. He grips my hips and takes my breast into his mouth. He leans back taking me with him. We find our rhythm again, as we softly move against each other.

He guides my hips up and down slowly. I lean forward, allowing him to slip out so I can feel his erection press against me, tease me. I bring him back to my entrance and sink down on him until he’s completely buried inside of me.

Evan holds on tight as I rock back and forth, side to side, feeling every inch of him fill me. “Oh, Juliette,” he moans into my mouth. I throw my head back and grind onto him harder. Each time I push down, I tighten my muscles around him. I feel that familiar pull and tightening as I call out Evan’s name. I explode around him, completely drained, and collapse on top of him.

Instantly, Evan has me on the bed, lying on my stomach and he slides out from under me. He glides me to the edge of the bed, and trails kisses down my back. The scruff on his chin scrapes seductively across the sensitive skin of my back, sending impulses raging through my body. Gradually, he enters me again. My nerve endings are raw, and instantly, I am brought back to the brink of ecstasy. His pace quickens, and he calls out my name as he explodes inside me.

We collapse onto the bed together, and Evan kisses me sweetly. Our breathing is ragged, and we are both wet with sweat and sex. Eventually, our breathing calms, and I am running my fingers through his hair, holding him tightly to me. “That was incredible,” he glows. We lay together for the longest time, wrapped in each other’s arms, gazing into each other’s eyes and sharing tender kisses.

My eyes grow heavy and I release a long, deep yawn. I’m exhausted. Evan pulls the blanket up over us, and I drift off while wrapped in his arms. I have the most amazing dreams of happily ever after.

I wake first this time. The sun is beaming through the window, casting a warm glow on the sleeping wonder that is my boyfriend. Evan’s dark hair is a wild frenzy, thanks in no small part to my appetite for running my fingers through it countless times last night.

The sheets are a tangled mess at the foot of the bed, and a swath of cloth barely covers us, exposing his body just enough so that I can enjoy the view. I love the vision of his bare chest, revealing his tight muscles. My eyes trail across his magnificent body, finding a delicate trail of hair that begins just below his navel and leads to his impressive manhood that brought me so much pleasure and delight last night.

Memories invade my mind, and I can feel my own arousal returning. We have crossed a threshold, and there’s no turning back. My heart is in his hands now. I can’t hold back or hide my feelings for him anymore. I want him. I need him. I adore him.

I slip slowly from the bed, trying not to disturb him. Tip-toeing around the room, I try to find my clothes. The image of Evan stripping off my shirt and tossing it across the deck flashes through my mind, and I abandon the search.

“Mmm ... good morning beautiful,” Evan’s voice hums. “Looking for something?” He stretches his arms and folds them back behind his head, muscles flexing and stretching in his biceps.

I almost forget that I am naked, standing in front of this beautiful man. I can only imagine what my hair must look like. “Good morning, handsome.”

“Come back to bed, sweetheart.” His eyes watch my every move. I shake my head, turn and start walking towards his bathroom. There’s no need to be shy around this man any more. Leaving the door wide open, I walk into the master bath, turn on the water, and step in to the glass-enclosed shower. The window facing the beach is wide open, and as I stand under the hot water, I watch the waves breaking on the surf. By the position of the sun on the horizon, I figure it must be sometime after eight. The hot water feels refreshing on my muscles that ache from last night’s workout. I close my eyes, and images of last night’s lovemaking occupy my every thought. A groan of satisfaction erupts low in my throat as the memories wash over me.

“I love to hear you make that sound. Was it for me?” Evan’s hands are on my hips as he stands behind me in the shower. Soft kisses sweep across my shoulder, and I release another soft moan of appreciation. No more words are needed.

Turning around to face him, I take a step back, pulling him with me so we are both bathed under the warm water pouring from above. Evan reaches across and grabs the shampoo as our bodies rub against one another. It sends chills down my spine despite the hot water washing over me. He pours a generous amount of shampoo into his hand, and he begins to wash my hair, massaging my scalp, and planting kisses on my chin. I lift my chin to rinse the shampoo from my hair, and as I do, Evan takes my breast into his mouth and entices each soft peak into tight firm buds.

I grab a sponge and some soap, which I work into a good lather and begin to wash his back and shoulders. He allows me to wash him, exploring every inch of his body. My sponge drifts across his chest, down his sides, between the fleshy folds of skin, and down his legs. Eager to visit every inch of skin on his hard body, I lower myself to wash his legs and the soft sensitive part behind each knee. Desire wells deep in my belly, and I look up at him, slowly taking him into my mouth, and lathing my tongue up and down his throbbing erection. When I take him deep into my throat, he closes his eyes and lets out a growl that urges me on. I love that I have such an effect on him. I take him right to the brink when suddenly, he withdraws and pulls me to my feet.

He lifts me up as my arms wrap around his neck and my legs wrap around his waist. “I want to come inside you. I want to watch you come for me.” He lowers me onto him and I melt into his strong arms. He takes a sharp intake of breath, and for a moment, he actually stops breathing. Slowly, he lifts me, and then lowers me as I grind my hips, searching for my own release. Our slow dance is incredibly sensual. There’s no rush this time. It is pure pleasure that radiates throughout my body. As I climb closer and closer, Evan’s tongue joins mine in an expression of want and need. His lips travel down my neck, nibbling and biting, when I feel him begin to shudder. A deep grunt escapes from his mouth as he releases into me, making my muscles tighten around him and squeeze, pulsing and throbbing. Incredible. Amazing. Mind-blowing.

We finish our shower and dry each other off. I’m starving and my body betrays me when my stomach begins growling uncontrollably loud. “Hungry?” Evan asks, smirking at me.

“I’m starving. Can you get my bag so I can finish up in here? I’ll join you in a minute.” Evan slips out of the bathroom and returns with my purse.

“Here’s your clothes, too. It’s a little chilly out, so I brought you one of my sweatshirts. There’s a blow dryer under the sink if you need it. Don’t be long.” He kisses me affectionately and disappears. I look down, and in my arms is an old UMD sweatshirt. I bring it to my nose and inhale his scent. I can’t wait to wrap myself in it. I hope he knows he’s never getting this back. Ever!

When I rejoin him, he’s sitting at the kitchen table reading the paper. The sight before me is a shock to the system. A beautiful man, drinking his coffee, reading the paper, taking a bite of his toast, he looks ... domestic. This incredible, sexy man is mine, at least for now, and I intend to enjoy every minute while it lasts.

He looks up at me, puts down the paper, rises, and walks purposefully towards me, sweeping me into his arms. “Juliette, seeing you wrapped up in my old college sweatshirt unravels me. I can’t seem to control myself around you. This could become a problem when we go out in public.” I giggle, kiss him and break our embrace. I need nourishment.

Evan’s phone rings. “Hey, Adam. What’s up?” While the boys chat on the phone, I make myself some toast, locate the butter on the counter, and find some yogurt in the refrigerator.

“Yeah, she’s here, she spent the night.” Evan glances over towards me and winks. God, he’s adorable. He begins pacing and he’s visibly upset. “Are you sure? Shit. I know. Okay. Yeah. No, I will. Today. Thanks, buddy. I owe you.”

“That sounded serious. Is everything okay?” Evan’s just staring out the window.

“No, not really. I have some business I need to take care of today. Can I come over when I’m done?” I was hoping he would say that.

“Yeah, I have to be to work by 7:00. Call me and come over when you’re done.”

I return home close to noon and I’m surprised to see Auggie is still home. It’s Thursday and he’s usually at the real estate office or meeting with clients. I walk over to him, and plant a kiss on his forehead.

Auggie looks at me and immediately spots the UMD sweatshirt I’m wearing. “Hey, Jette, looks like you had a good night. How ya feeling?” His face is expressionless. There’s something off in his demeanor.

“I’m great. Never better, in fact. How about you?”

“I have something to show you, Jepetto. Come here, sit down. You’re not going to like it.” I sit beside him in our usual spots at the kitchen island and he passes over his iPad for me to see. He’s got the TMZ website up and all I can see is the headline, “Big Mac is Back” with the subheading, “Romping on the Beach with Mystery Woman”.

“I don’t understand. Who’s Big Mac?”

“Just swipe down. You’ll see.”

My heart stops and I can’t breathe. Staring back at me is a picture of Evan holding me over his shoulder on the beach. I remember exactly when that picture was taken. Holy shit. I try to focus and read the first few lines of the article.

New Jersey Sentinels Back-up Quarterback Evan “Big Mac” McGuire hasn’t even played his first game with the team, but he seems to have found a new girl to huddle with.

“What the fuck?”

Date: 2015-02-28; view: 627