The final version

The final version of our cyclone story, let us say for a newspaper, is now almost ready.
We check for mistakes, and are satisfied that we have made none.

We then check for missing details. We have not given the names of the dead and injured, so we might phone the police and the hospital. Both places tell us that names will not be released until the families have been informed. This must be included in our story.

There are no details yet of damage outside Honiara, and it may be difficult to get that information if telephone lines are down and roads flooded. This, too, should be added to the story.

Our finished version should now look like this:

Six people were killed and more than 100 left homeless when Cyclone Victor hit the Solomon Islands yesterday.
Three men drowned when their car was blown off the road into a river, in the national capital, Honiara.
Two women and a man were killed by flying debris, and a further 18 people are being treated in hospital for minor injuries.
The names of the dead and injured are not being released until relatives have been informed.
More than 20 homes were destroyed and a number of other buildings were badly damaged.
The emergency services are still awaiting news from outlying districts. However, they believe that Honiara has been the worst hit.
Communications between Honiara and other areas have been disrupted by the cyclone.
Cyclone Victor was first detected at 2 a.m. yesterday by staff at the Nadi Weather Centre.
They plotted it travelling south-west across the Pacific towards the Solomon Islands.
An hour later, they contacted the Solomon Islands government to warn them of the cyclone's approach.
Government officials put emergency plans into operation. They radioed ships in the area and broadcast warnings to Solomon Islanders over the radio.
Police officers were sent out to warn people.
By 10 a.m., winds in the capital, Honiara, were blowing at more than 140 kilometres per hour.
Two hours later the centre of Cyclone Victor passed over Honiara before tracking into the Coral Sea, where it blew itself out.
Mopping-up operations have now started in Honiara.

TO SUMMARISE:

Remember to read your story through thoroughly before handing it in. If you find any errors, correct them - then read it through again.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• Does your intro meet the six requirements we discussed at the end of the previous chapter?
• Have you chosen the key points? Have you ranked them in order when writing your story?
• Has your story answered the six questions Who? What? Where? When? Why? and How?
• Have you presented the facts in an orderly manner and provided links between different segments?
• Have you read it through again?

Date: 2015-01-29; view: 875